Understanding Sex Therapy

For generations, we as humans have been conditioned to keep sex between ourselves and our partners. Talk of sex outside the marital relationship has been considered inappropriate in the past, though this is rapidly changing. In addition to talking about your friends about sex, you can also take part in sex therapy when you and your partner are having difficulty with your sex life. This can serve to uncover underlying problems and move past insecurities and fears.

Who are sex therapists?
Some sex therapists are psychiatrists or psychologists who have medical degrees and who handle other patients besides sex therapy. Others are social workers, medical therapists or family therapists who have taken classes about sexology and who have an intimate understanding of the physiological and emotional benefits of sex in general. If you think that your difficulties with sex are physical, you might want to go to a medical doctor.

Who takes part in sex therapy?
Sex therapy can be for either couples or individuals who are having difficulty with their sex lives. Couples usually attend sessions together while individuals have one-on-one sessions. Sex therapy can also be for homosexual or transgendered individuals or couples who are experiencing problems with sex. Don't think that just because you are "normal" in every other regard means that you can't benefit from the counsel of an experienced professional.

Do you have sex in sex therapy?
This is a common misconception that should be cleared up right now. If you are undergoing sex therapy with a reputable and experienced therapist, you will not ever be asked to perform any physical acts during your sessions. You might be given homework by the therapist that involves sexual or physical encounters, but those exercises take place outside the therapist's office. If you are ever asked to touch one another or undress, leave immediately.

What if I want to go but my spouse doesn't?
Sex therapy doesn't have to be couples therapy, though it will certainly be beneficial if the therapist can talk to you both. If you are concerned about your sex life but your partner isn't comfortable with the concept, you can certainly go alone. Just respect your spouse's privacy and discuss only issues with which he or she is comfortable.

How long are the sessions?
Most sex therapy sessions last for about an hour, though you can certainly tailer them to your needs after your initial consultation with your therapist. Keep an open mind and don't be afraid to request longer or shorter sessions.

Will we have to discuss our sex life?
If you want to get anything out of sex therapy, you'll have to go into as much detail as possible about your sex life and the problems you've been having. If the therapist can't understand your concerns, there's no way for him or her to offer guidance.