Uptight and Need a Cure? Get a Puppy

We really weren't even looking for a dog, he found us. The wife and I had been thinking about getting a dog for a couple of years, but each time the subject came up we talked ourselves out of it. We made excuses like "It would be too much hassle", and "It would make us give up to much freedom". The real underlying issue for me was simple-I'm anal. I like things a certain way, and in a particular order, and having a dog would definitely complicate that part of me. Things have a certain place where they belong, and a certain way that they must be, and throwing a dog into that mix would surely change all of that and send my OCD world into a tailspin.

Then one day it happened. We're sitting at dinner with some friends and we here the question that would forever mess up my perfect little deranged world. "Know anyone who wants a dog?" She asked. Me, being completely out of my mind at the time replied "Why, who's dog are we talking about?"

Then the whole process begins. We hear how he's not in the best of situations, and that he needs to go to a good home where he'll be taken care of and loved, and then I hear the words that make me seriously contemplate this crazy idea of getting a dog, "He's free".

Now we're in too deep to back out. There is no turning back. Okay, so maybe we did have a couple of days to think about it, but for some reason my mind was already made up at that dinner table that we were going to get this dog. Of course I did talk to the wife and get her thoughts on the subject, but I knew sitting at the table that night, that I had just single-handedly ruined my life- or so I thought.

Shortly thereafter, Brock, the White German Shepherd entered my perfect little put together life. I guess I should have said previously put together life. So all of you fellow anal-retentive, partially obsessive compulsive people out there, I know something that can help cure your problem, at least a little bit-a puppy!

Puppies really don't care about what you want. Their entire world is based around what is good for them. When they want to go outside, and when they want to play. They don't care that you, being the uptight anal-retentive person you are, really need to straighten up the house right when you get home. They don't care that you have a strong desire to stick to the plan you've had in your head all day for the evening's activities. They want it their way and they want it RIGHT NOW! I could always see the look on his face, and read what was on his mind when I walked in the door, "You are mine for at least the next hour, or even two." Puppies have a way of being very demanding. It's a good thing for a person with a personality like mine. It shockingly helps you to relax.

What did I just say? Me relax? Yeah right. I am actually very serious though. Brock has done wonderful things for me. A dog tends to teach us anal-retentive people a few things. Normally I am crazy obsessive about having a clean car. If you want to take care of that in a hurry, throw a big white hairy four legged fur ball in the backseat. Ever since my car has been completely off limits to most people, especially those wearing black pants, and I finally had to give up on trying to keep it even remotely free of hair. It's useless. You vacuum it and in about 1 day it is right back to where you started so I gave up trying. Positive dog effect no. 1: I don't have to vacuum the car all the time now. The trend has just started.

I already mentioned having a plan in my head for when I get home, and always having to straighten up the house when I walk in the door. A dog can cure that as well, and Brock did wonders to help me with my problem when I walked in one evening to lay my eyes on what I thought was a feather massacre. Turns out Brock just wanted to let me know we needed an entire set of new pillows. Apparently he felt that the old ones where worn out and decided to cleanse them so to speak. He had pillow stuffing from the bedroom, out into the living room, and even out into the dining room. He thought the problem was solved and all I could do was laugh. You heard me right. This partially obsessive compulsive, anal-retentive guy walks into his house and witnesses a pillow massacre and all he can do is laugh. Introducing positive dog effect no. 2.

Brock has helped me to overcome a lot of other things has well. He has taught me that it is okay to have your bathtub cleaned daily by dog tongue. That's right. All you have to do is get out of the shower, let the dog in the room and he will systematically clean your bathtub for you, or at least the edge of it. He also cleans other things that he thinks need his attention, the main one being dirty dishes. All you have to do is start loading the dish washer, and if he thinks a certain spoon or dish needs some extra attention and cleaning before actually being washed, Brock is on the case and starts the tongue lashing marathon. Bowls are his favorite and coming in a close second would be silverware. You think this guy would have even remotely been okay with dog tongue on dishes before. Not a chance. With that you have positive dog effect no. 3.

You can see by all of these examples that Brock has definitely been a good addition for me. He is now over a year old, but still has held on to many of his puppy ways. They have toned down quite a bit but if you look closely under the surface they are still there and just waiting to come roaring out. After almost a year of having Brock, I have only covered just a few of the things he has taught me. I still tend to get very frustrated with him at times, but he always succeeds in making me slow down and take the time to appreciate my surroundings. He has taught me that the first priority when I come home his him, and not the silly priorities that I have. He has also taught me how to function very well at 3 in the morning when he decides that he forgot to go to the bathroom when you let him out at 11pm. It is just his nature.

The way I see it, he was suppose to find us and especially me, to teach me about the rules of life. To teach me that every once in awhile you have to slow down, breathe the fresh air, relax, and not want to kill him for using the remote as a chew toy. I can still hear the sound of crunching plastic.

In the years to come I'm sure Brock will teach me a lot more things about how life works. I'm looking forward to all of the lessons, and to all of the times he will nudge my crotch to make sure I'm paying attention.