Using a Cell Phone in Public - is it Really Necessary?

Yesterday, it happened again. This time, I was in line at the post office. The young lady immediately ahead of me received a call on her cell phone. Over the next five minutes, I learned more about her than I know about some people I've known for years.

During that short time, I learned she was about to lose her job, but she didn't care, since it was a dead end anyway. The big problem had to do with the evenings plans; she wasn't sure how she was going to pay to get into the club later that night. She finally decided she would call her date of the previous evening, since he owed her for what she "thrown on" him after dinner, any paying her way was the least he could do, considering he wasn't all that good. But in the meantime, could the caller (who I gathered was her current BFF) help her figure out how to get her uncle out of jail? He had been picked up for failure to pay his child support and needed to post bail.

All this information was mine, free for the taking, with no effort on my part to gain access to it. The other four people in line also got treated to this real life soap opera, along with the three postal employees behind the counter. Apparently, the idea that discussing her sex life, a family problem, and an impending job loss in front of a bunch of strangers was fine with her.

The problem was - I didn't want to hear it.

This is not the first time. I've had the same problem in the supermarket line, at the drugstore, and even waiting in line at the movies. A friend of mine once told me about a lady in his church who took a cellphone call in the middle of Communion! Apparently, making arrangements to meet friends for lunch was a little more important than a few moments of uninterrupted reflection on the Lord.

Madness of this type seems to be a growing epidemic - people feeling free to share way too much information in a setting where silence would truly be golden, and not caring who hears them or what they think.

What is it about cell phones that make perfectly rational people feel compelled to discuss personal business anywhere and anytime? Have we all lost what little sense of propriety we once had? Is discretion a lost art? Do these people not realize that sharing private conversations in a public setting is not only rude and stupid, but it might be dangerous as well? After all, you never know who is listening, and what they could do with those little gems of information that are trickling from your lips.

I have a fantasy. I see myself waiting patiently as one more idiot chooses to trumpet his or her personal business in my presence. Once they finish with the call, I'm going to calmly put the individual in a head lock and proceed to tell him or her exactly what they need to do in order to fix all the situations just discussed on the cell phone. If the individual gets indignant and tells me to mind my own business, I'll reply "Be glad to, if you can learn to keep your #$%^ business to yourself and discuss it outside my presence!"

I feel it coming. One day soon, I'm gonna snap. And when it happens, I may end up using my cell phone in front a bunch of cops as I beg for somebody to bail me out of jail. But you know what? It'll be worth it.