Venting on Paper

Do you find it difficult to express your true feelings to others? Do you let other's have their way all the time just to avoid conflict? Do you experience a constant sense of unease or agitation even in your more peaceful moments?

So many individuals live this way. While it may seem admirable to keep our feelings to ourselves, it creates quite a bit of inner turmoil.

Unexpressed feelings can cause depression and weaken the immune system, leaving us vulnerable to illness and disease. It can be detrimental to our personal relationships, our sense of security, and overall ability to enjoy life.

Of course, voicing our opinions about every little thing to every person we come across isn't a healthy expression of our feelings. There are definitely situations when it is important to be open and honest with others, but what about those times when it isn't such a good idea?

To begin with, we need to understand one very important thing: It is OK to feel the way you feel. There is nothing wrong with that. The problem comes from refusing to admit you feel a certain way.

You can deny that you feel angry, sad, hurt, or offended, but it doesn't change the fact that you still feel that way. This is where that constant sense of unease or agitation comes from; it consists of all the feelings you have in the background that you don't admit are there.

What you need is a safe way to get these feelings out so you'll no longer be tormented by them.

Venting on Paper

Venting on paper is an incredible way to express our feelings. It may seem like such an insignificant and outmoded thing to do, but you'd be surprised at how effective it can be.

The key is honesty. The reason a lot of people don't get the results they want from doing this is usually because they aren't being completely honest. This is especially true when it comes to writing down negative feelings about another person; there's a lot of guilt that comes into play. But you need to realize something: the grudges and resentments you carry around about others are far more harmful to them than anything you write on the page. The point of writing your feelings down is so that you don't have to carry them around with you anymore.

Try using the following steps to get positive results from venting on paper:

1. The next time you experience an unhappy feeling about another person or a situation in your life, take out a piece of paper and write down exactly how you feel. It may help to do this in a question and answer form. Ask yourself a question about how you feel and answer it. Keep doing this until you feel the issue has been resolved for you.

2. Exaggerate the feeling. Be as angry as you want to be. Often when we magnify the severity of a situation, it is enough to make us realize it's just not that big of a deal.

3. After you feel you have said all that you need to say and have expressed the feeling in full, go back and read what you have written.

4. When you feel ready, crumble up the paper and throw it away as a symbol of your willingness to let it go.

Remember no one ever has to see what you have written. Don't feel guilty about any of the things you say. It will only work if you are completely honest.

Now that you aren't harboring all those grudges and resentments your relationships will begin to improve and life will feel a lot friendlier. You may even notice an improvement in your health.

Why not try it for one week and find out for yourself if it makes a difference.