Waiting Until Marriage: Alternatives to Sex
Obviously, the amount of sexual tension will depend on how long the couple will have to wait, and how sexually oriented they are in personality. Some people can't go two days without sex, while others find different ways to express themselves physically. Whatever the case, two people who love each other will want to be intimate, but there are ways to keep yourselves occupied until the big day.
1. Be Active Together
Go to the zoo, the park, a baseball game or the water park. Visit friends, family and the movies together. Sitting around in an empty house with only sex to think about will weaken your resolve. Instead, get out of the house and enjoy one another in public. This will take the emphasis off of sex and intimacy until you get married.
2. Make Plans
There is nothing more time-consuming than planning for your wedding, so sit around at the kitchen table and plan different aspects of marriage. The flowers, the rings, the guest list, the dress, the church, the reception, and yes, the Honeymoon Suite can all be planned as you wait to have sex. It will give you something to look forward to.
3. Express Love in Different Ways
One of the main reasons why couples wait until marriage for sex is because they want to emphasize other things that make a marriage strong. Love, devotion, loyalty, compassion and personality traits are all just as important as sex, so make them a big deal. Spend time every day to be alone and to cuddle with one another, perhaps talking about what you love about your relationship. This will ensure that your commitment to one another is strong, and that you aren't all-consumed about sexual thoughts.
4. Kiss
Some people feel more closely tied to another through a kiss than even through a more sexual act. Unless your religion or belief structure prohibits it, take time every day to kiss and cuddle together. If you have any restraint at all, this shouldn't lead to sex, but will allow you to forge an intimate bond even before your wedding day.
5. Stand by Your Decision
Your friends might think you're crazy for waiting until marriage to have sex, but don't listen to them. If possible, stay away from conversations about sex, or from anything that might lead you to weaken your resolve. Once you've made a decision like this, you should stick by it, no matter what might happen. Imagine how sweet it will be when you finally get to have sex after your marriage has been solidified.
Published by Steve Thompson
Steve is a full-time freelance writer. In addition to the more than 3,000 articles he's written for AC, he has also written articles and other materials for more than 100 happy clients. He enjoys writing abo... View profile
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- Spend time being active together.
- Cuddle, kiss and touch as often as possible.
- Stick to your guns when waiting until marriage.
25 Comments
Post a CommentThis is a awesome article. And it helps when single women see that men are taking the same vow. It lets us know there is still gentlemen in the world. Thanks Steve
ITS BEST TO WAIT ON MARRIAGE
well i think people should wait untll they r married to have sex why because thats what god want you to do and you are saving yourself for the right person
My girlfriend and I are waiting. We both have already graduated college and are doing extra school.
This article makes it seem like its a real hard thing to do. If you are so one minded that you can do nothing but think about sex and have to hold yourself back, that is unhealthy.
I dont even care. Its not a big deal.
Im
I agree that sex should be a part of a relationship. I recently vowed that I am going to wait until marriage for sex and I hope to get a purity ring sometime in the near future. Losing your virginity should be to someone you love. I am only 16 but I still want to make that vow. Waiting is not hard at all when you know that's what you want. I have a boyfriend of a year and a half and most of me not wanting to lose my virginity has to do with my religion but also some of my personal moral values. What else can you give your husband when you've already given him your heart, your soul, your love, your everything? Nothing except your virginity. It shouldn't just be something you throw around. My boyfriend isn't as with me on that subject but loves me enough to want to wait. I do have a question. Waiting until sex until marriage...does that include all "sexual activities"?
My ex-boyfriend and I were going out for 4 years when he broke up with me because I wanted to wait for marriage to have sex. He knew my thoughts on the subject all along but he didn't want to wait anymore. So, I'm over him. If he couldn't respect my wishes then he wasn't the right one anyway. I'm glad I didn't give it away.
My fiance and I have always felt it would be wrong to live together before we are married. Problem is we would still stay the night at each other's places and pretend like we were not living together. After we got engaged it suddenly hit me with the weight of guilt that I am fooling myself and I still have a chance in this time before we get married to refrain from cohabiting and physical intimacy.
Both of us have not only "fooled around" but have gone the whole way. And it has been amazing to make love to each other. But now I just suddenly know that I cant do this to myself anymore, I have to give myself the chance to make right.
I have been recording my failings and successes in a blog and would be very grateful to have feedback! here is the link if you are interested: http://tryingtowaituntilmarriage.blogspot.com/
:)
I hope sex will be magnificent once I get married, if I'm lucky enough to get married. I know that when I am loved my man will appreciate my virginity and just embrace our mental, emotional, and spiritual connection. He also won't mind physically touching each other without actually going all the way. That's a major quality I NEED in my man.
My lover and I are waiting until marriage. He is a good church boy, and I am someone not religious, i would say. He was the one who wanted to wait, and since i love him so dearly, i agreed. Now.... He is the one that really wants to make love, and I am the one always stopping him. Yet, I want it so bad. We do go to basketball games, soccer games, go play tennis together, double or triple dates, go to the movies, family dinners, go take photos since we are both into photography, go boating, talk about our wedding, our honeymoon, plan stuff for our future, and many other fun activities. Yet we just always find our selves wanting to have sex, make passionate love.
We have a great communication, have each others complet trust, we respect each other, care, and we are so different that we are always teaching each others new things.
The reason why we are not married, is because of financial problems. We are not on debt, or anything, we just want to save up to have enough money to start a f