"We Made It!"

Like most people, I am sure, I found graduation day to be surreal. The seniors had practiced the day before so everyone knew where they would be sitting and who they were spending one of the biggest moments of their lives next to. People gave speeches. Even though it was my first graduation I felt like every speech was a total cliche. "We made it!" "Your future is bright!" "The road less traveled..." and all that good stuff. I did not have enough sense at the time to really freak out about this momentous occasion. That came later in the summer, when I realized I was not heading back to school with all of my friends. When I realized everything was going to be new and different, that college would be much harder, that I had to succeed or else. When I realized I needed to decide what I wanted to be when I grew up and declare a major.

No, that is not what graduation is for. Graduation is for looking back. And it is just the start of looking back, because at Graduation you realize that life will never be like it was in high school. Life will never be as simple as it was then, no mater how hard you tried to complicate it with school work, after school activities and plain old teenage drama. Graduation is for reminiscing the good times, feeling regret over missed opportunities and for recognizing the aspects of high school you will not miss. I spent my graduation and the days leading up to it taking pictures of friends and teachers, making everyone promise to keep in touch. I remembered the good times I had with my peers, even the ones whose names I could not remember. I should have just asked that guy out, I thought he was really cute but just too plain shy to say anything. If I had really tried harder I could have gotten straight A's. The days of being treated like a child are over. No more over crowded hallways and class filled to the breaking point with people who do not care and do not want to be there. Never again will I have to take gym.

Ultimately, graduation did not feel real to me. It did not seem plausible that it was all over so suddenly. I thought back to my freshman year when it seemed like high school was going to take forever, that I could not wait to be a senior. I thought I would feel that great sense of accomplishment because I had "made it." Instead I thought about how warm it was, how uncomfortable the chairs were, and which graduation parties I would be attending that weekend. In spite of my hazy recollection of the actual ceremony, I have great memories from that day. That evening was my own graduation party, which my mother had done a wonderful job of setting up for. She had a display board with pictures, awards and report cards. My closest friends came and stayed all night long, while others filtered in throughout the evening. I have pictures and a congratulations banner everyone had signed. Graduation may not have been what I thought it would be, but it was a special day none the less.