Wedding Expense Traditions

First, the bride and groom must sit down and make out a list of things they have to buy or procure for their wedding. Larger expenses include the wedding dress, rental expenses for a church or facility for the ceremony and reception, catering, the wedding cake, the rehearsal dinner, and flowers.

When making a budget, be reasonable. If you know that your families are probably not going to be able to chip in for your wedding, try to down size on things that matter less than others. This varies from couple to couple. Some couples are okay with just having h'orderves at the wedding rather than a full sit down meal. Others would like to order fewer flower arrangements and go all out for the dinner. It really depends on the tastes of the couple.

Tradition - The Bride's Family

When it comes to tradition, it states that the bride's family pays for the following wedding expenses -

Wedding Gown, Vail & Accessories

Bridesmaid Bouquets

Grandmother Corsages

Flower Arrangements

Rented Items for the Wedding/Reception

Invitations

Wedding Programs

Printed Napkins

Church Rental Fee

Musician/Organist

Caterer

Wedding Photography/Videographer

Band/DJ

Wedding Cake

Wedding Favors

Father of the Bride Formal Wear

Tradition - The Groom's Family

It's always great to have a son - partially because there are much fewer expenses when it comes to a wedding. Traditionally, the groom's family pays for the following wedding expenses:

Groom's Cake

Rehearsal Dinner

Father of Groom Formal Wear

Tradition - The Bride

If you're approaching your parents expecting them to pay for your wedding expenses, you must be fair. Part of the fairness is accepting that tradition states that the bride also has to come up with the funds to pay for some of the expenses as well. Tradition states that the bride is to pay the following expenses:

Wedding Ring for Groom

Wedding Gift for Groom

Bridesmaid Gifts

Bridesmaid Luncheon

Accommodations for out-of town Guests

Tradition - The Groom

The groom also has his fair share of expenses to pay. If tradition is followed, the following expenses should be paid by the groom:

Wedding Ring for Bride

Wedding Gift for Bride

Groomsmen Gifts

Bride's Bouquet

Mother's Corsages

Groom's Boutonniere

Groomsmen Boutonnieres

Marriage License

Minister's Fee

Limousine

Honeymoon Travel Expenses and Accommodations

The Bridemaid, Maid of Honor, Groomsmen and Best Man should be responsible for their own wedding attire. As well as the flower girls or ring bearers parents should be responsible for any formal wear for their children.

The out of town guests should be responsible for their travel arrangements as well.

When planning a wedding, remember that these are just traditions and nothing is set in stone. Don't go to your parents telling them they HAVE to pay for your wedding or you're not going to get very far. The best thing to do is to sit down with each family separately and go through the budget you've come up with ahead of time. It's a good idea to call around and get prices on event locations and restaurants. The bride's family should carefully go through the budget and tell you what is realistically possible and what is not. The groom's family will want to know what type of restaurants you've come up with and their prices. They'll also need to know how many attendants will be in the wedding so coming up with a head count for the rehearsal dinner is also a good idea.

Sometimes tradition goes out the window and the families may decide to give the bride and groom a set budget amount and if you go over that, you are responsible for your own wedding expenses. This is a perfectly reasonable solution. Also, if one family clearly has more disposable income than another, there might be an agreement for the families to split expenses more equally or one family to pay more than the other.

Another solution is downsizing your plans. You can plan a wedding on a budget. Think about what is most important to you, not to your friends and other guests. If you just want a big party to show off, remember that you might be paying that off your credit card for a long time to come for a few hours of fun. What might be more fun is having a longer or more elaborate honeymoon and a smaller wedding event.

There are many ways to have a beautiful wedding on a budget. First instance, have a smaller event in a chapel or a community center. Have the wedding later in the afternoon and only serve h'orderves instead of a full meal. Have a DJ instead of hiring a band. Shop around for your wedding cake. Even grocery stores like Publix make beautiful cakes and they are reasonably priced - more so than a bakery. Skip the rehearsal dinner or have the rehearsal dinner at a family member's home by planning a cookout or other type of dinner. These are all reasonable solutions when it comes to planning the big event.

All that really matters is that you are getting married and spending the rest of your life with your mate. The wedding is just a few hours of entertainment for your family and friends and you shouldn't go all out unless you have a means of paying for it.