What to Do After You've Lost Your Shirt

My tenured 48K teaching job was getting more and more stressful by the day. From crack-dealing seventh graders to speaking-in-tongues Bible bangers on the school board, my school district featured a darn good cross section of everything that is wrong in US public education today. When the superintendent, who had told the faculty on more than one occasion that academics were "overrrated," approved the implementation of a C honor roll, I finally decided that enough was enough.

It was time for me to quit the public education racket and pursue my dreams. I decided to become a freelance copywriter. In the two years that followed, I lost everything: my house, my wife, my children, two dogs, my sense of self-worth, and finally my sanity.

Everything.

It took over a year, and a Herculean effort to win back the truly important things in my life. Most of that effort was spent getting my priorities straight, realizing what it was that truly importanyt to me. It was a harrowing journey, one that I wouldn't recommend to anyone.

More power to those who can make a livelihood of their dreams, and speaking for myself, what's to say it won't happen to me in the end? Life is long and full of opportunities.

In the meantime, I'm earning my living working an honest job. Starting at the bottom of my employer's organizational ladder, I served that organization well enough to earn my first promotion a few months ago, gaining a modest raise in the process. I know that if I meet my obligations to my company, I will receive another raise - and a significant one at that.

In my new position, I am currently responsible for the paychecks of 22 trainees. More importantly, I am responsible for ensuring they will be properly prepared to help those customers who call them for help. They need the knowledge, interpersonal skills, and confidence to meet the challenges of a very demanding job. It's a responsibility I take very seriously, and as a result, my work days have increased from eight hours to anywhere from nine to eleven hours. Long work days, yes. But this is a responsibility which which I have been entrusted. I accepted this responsibility, because I gained a sense of self-worth from it. Therefore I carry this burden willingly.

In addition to that, I take great care to meet my responsibilities toward my wife and children. Does she need attention, or does she need her space? I need to gauge these things carefully, seek a balance between my own needs and hers so that we can maintain a relationship that benefits us both, and one partner doesn't lose himself in the needs of the other. Meeting my obligations toward her, I also consider the needs of my children, and I labor diligently to strengthen our bonds. These are important and work-intensive commitments, but when I made these commitments, I did so with open eyes.

That doesn't leave me much time to write the Great American Novel, or the million dollar bestseller. But somehow, I'm finding the time to write this article. Having been left to my own devices on a rare day off, I now realize that I have been writing all day today.

How about that?

I'm not saying I wouldn't mind being rich. But I'd like to offer a few questions. Why does everyone have to be a movie star or a famous athlete? Or a bestselling author? What's wrong with just holding down a job and being a responsible person, to simply end the day with a clean conscience?

So many hardworking people do just that, and in so doing, they perform countless acts of genuine heroism. What can be more heroic than to triumph over pride, anger, dishonesty, and self-loathing? What prize can be more wonderful than that of a day well spent and in the end: a life well lived? Too often, we look to the wrong types of people when they define their heroes. Jean-Claude Van Damme is a brilliant martial artist, and he certainly is seen with a many attractive women. And this rapper or that rock star seems to enjoy reveling in luxury. These people have served their fans well, and they have attained their status through just the right combination of hard work, talent - and luck. Despite their well-deserved achievements, they, are just people, and they must face the same demons as everyone else. And we can't all be like them, and like it or not, most of us will never have what they have.

The sooner we realize that's okay, the better off we will be.

So who are my heroes?

My heroes are the single moms who work two jobs, so they can support their children. They are the people right out of rehab who are trying to put their lives back together, so they can stay healthy, make amends to the people they have hurt, and grow personally and spiritually. And they are the plain, honest people - whose lives are too unremarkable in the eyes of the papparazzi - who are simply trying to earn an honest living as best as they can. Some of them are gifted with amazing creative talents. Others are gifted with a truly inspiring work ethic. Some are blessed with an amazing capability to demonstrate grace under fire, others with an eagerness to learn new skills. All of them would rather hold down an honest job and meet their obligations instead of leading thoroughly dishonorable lives.

They are the people who work in call centers, the ones who give me the time it takes to resolve your issue, even though there may be over thirty calls in the queue. They work in fast food restaurant, drawing pride and satisfaction when my order is processed correctly, remebering to hand my children that cardboard crown or plastic toy. They are the cops who tell me I've been driving on your rim; they flashed their red and blues when they saw my tire blow, then waited with me in the cold, rainy night for the tow truck to arrive - just to make sure I'm okay. They are the retirees in their blue vests who welcome me to the store with a smile. They are the therapists who tell me how proud they are that I managed to get off my pity-pot and back on my feet. They are my wife and my kids - and my friends - the who have chosen not to turn their backs on me, after all I have put them through.

These people are my heroes. It is their service I honor. And even If I can serve them only half as well as they have served me, I will have accomplished something truly worthwhile.