What to Do when You Dislike a Member of Your Family!

A while ago I wrote an article titled "What You Should Do When You Dislike Your Child's Friends". The article offered advice and tips, even personal experiences, on what any parent could do when they do not like their children's friends.

However, when writing the article I did not think about family members. Unlike friends, family is someone you can not get away from, and most families do have the one family member they do not like.

I am no exception. In my families case it is my eleven year old niece. She is the type of child that does not like to share anything, including family members. If, at anytime, she feels like someone is taking the attention off from her or not letting her do what she wants she will begin to mouth off, cry, and throw a tantrum better than any two year old. Unfortunately this happens all day long and when she is not acting like this she is physically mean to anyone smaller than her. Worse, is the swearing. The girl has a vocabulary better than any sailor.

To say I do not care to be around her is an understatement, but worse I do not want my own children even near her. This is easier said than done since she lives with my parents and the only way to avoid her is to stop visiting my parents.

Which I will not do, however, there are some things you can do to help make being around the dreadful family member easier.

1) Ask yourself why they are the way they are. In my nieces case I like to think it is all emotional. She has lost two fathers due to divorce, her mother is very sick and has to be taken care of. To top it all off, her birth father recently decided to come back into her life.

2) Bite your tongue. This is easier said than done but sometimes ignoring them is better than fighting with them. It was very hard for me to not say anything when my niece called me a bad word, but I know if I do she will start crying and than everyone is miserable. Sometimes it is just best to ignore the person and walk away.

3) Talk to your family. My mother began feeling like I did not want to see her when my visits became shorter and shorter. I finally told her it was not her but my niece. Being around her makes me upset and miserable, as well as, I do not want my own children around such behavior.

There are a lot of tips on what one can do when it comes to family members you don't like. Unfortunately it all comes down to two things. The first is to avoid them as much as possible and if you can't than to ignore. It is very hard on other family members when two do not get along, so for the sake of your parents, or other family member, the best advice is to be the bigger the person.