What to Do when Your Doctor Just Doesn't Understand You

It's hard to know what to do when your doctor just doesn't understand you. Too many people leave a doctor's appointment they have been anxiously awaiting feeling worse than when they arrived. In lots of cases they aren't upset because of a troubling diagnosis but because they honestly feel that their doctor just doesn't understand them or their medical issues as clearly as they would like. There are some concrete steps that you can take to improve your communication with your physician to avoid this kind of annoyance.

Perhaps most important is to know exactly what information you want to get across to your doctor about a specific condition or symptoms before you ever enter the doctor's office. Help yourself to share this information more clearly by writing out what you plan to say on paper. Read it back to yourself or read it to a spouse or friend and ask them to help you edit what you plan to say for clarity. Reduce the number of words you will use to explain yourself to as few as possible. Take out sentences that are empty of value in terms of putting across what is happening medically. Too much information about peripheral matters can make it more difficult for the doctor to weed through to your actual complaint or ailment. Know what you want the doctor to know and find the most concise way you can think of to say it. Write that statement on a card and take it with you to the doctor's office. If you get tongue tied or sense that you are wandering in your explanation hand him the card or read what's on it to help you both focus on the real medical issue.

Determine to listen carefully to what the doctor asks you and to answer as directly as possible. Communication is a two way street and you can be as guilty of poor communication skills as your doctor. Many times patients are anxious, upset or just plain not feeling well and these conditions can contribute to all kids of extraneous sharing which can make it difficult for the doctor to get to the point and provide a useful solution. The less you can confuse the issue with excess examples, emotional sidebars and your own unskilled diagnosis the easier you make it for your physician to respond.

If you continue to be fearful that your doctor is missing your point or you are making your point efficiently then it is time to take additional steps. One that can be quite helpful is bringing another person with you into the examining room. Make certain that this accompanying spouse or friend understands his or her purpose. They are not sharing the experience as a social venture. They are present to help verify and clarify for both you and your doctor. Do not choose someone to accompany you who can't handle this kind of an intermediary role. You are looking not for more words, but for more comprehensible exchanges.

Don't be afraid to challenge your physician. It may be hard to recognize the reality when he or she is marching around in their white medical coat that your doctor is your employee. You have hired your doctor to be on the staff of people who are charged with keeping you well. If you feel communication with your doctor is an issue then you have both the right and really the responsibility to broach that subject in a way that is respectful of his busy schedule but illustrative of your concerns.

Last resort. When the lack of sound communication seems like it is impeding your ability to get the right or sufficient care, then it may be time to seek other help. If your doctor is part of a joint practice maybe a simple switch to another physician can be arranged. There are also on line services that can help you to search for a new member for you personal medical team. Good medical treatment sometimes requires a few steps by the patient to achieve. So when your doctor just doesn't understand you or you don't really get him/her then don't be afraid to move on.