What Does Marriage Require?

"Will you marry me?" These four words, more than any other in our language, have the ability to change lives. The lives of the couple involved, the lives of their family and friends and most of the time eventually, the lives of their offspring. Marriage is an agreement between two partners to work together to better themselves and one another. Each of the partners decisions directly affect one another, from how the first question is asked all the way to what the epitaph is when their life ends. Those who are married, living together unmarried or for "constitutional reasons" not allowed to actually become married, whether they admit it or not, live by one simple saying: you get what you put in.

The first article is titled "Great Expectations," and is written by Stephanie Coontz, an author and teacher at Evergreen State College in Olympia Washington (403). Her article describes the amount of importance people put on their marriage. Coontz writes "people now place a higher value on marriage than ever before in history (403)." In the past not much emphasis was on marriage, it was a requirement that needed to met, not a search for everlasting love. Today, people place such a high priority on marriage that if it does fail it seems they set themselves up to high (404). Although, if that giant leap eventually turns into something truly amazing, it has a seemingly unbelievable affect on the couple that they can not even explain.

The second article written by Yale University graduate Jonathan Rauch, "A More Perfect Union," outlines the debate over the gay marriage issue (411). While showing both viewpoints on the highly debatable topic of gay marriage, Rauch proves his intelligence of the situation and understanding of both liberal and conservative sides. As a homosexual himself (subtly revealed in the article), one may argue Rauch has a bias on the subject. Even though he does side with legalizing gay marriage, he respects his opposition's point of view as well. As in the first article, Rauch finds marriage as the ultimate goal. Even if this goal takes time, he thinks it should start of on a smaller scale, a state wide trial (411). He agrees marriage is a sacred institution, but between two people who are in love, not just a man and a woman. He claims that marriage is a right of all American citizens, not a courtship based solely on the bible (413). After all, not everyone in the world, especially in the "mutt" of all countries, the United States, abides solely by the bible. There's a reason we separated church and state and it is for reasons such as this.

In the third article, "Baby, This Is Forever," written by Phillip Hodson was published in the London Times (419). This article in ways contradicts Rauch's, but at the same time confirms both it and "Great Expectations." In Hodson's article he explains that as part of an unmarried couple, he believes that marriage is all about the children (419). Marriage, or being unmarried with children, is about procreation and needs to have a high value in society's eyes. "We need to suffer for our offspring, to lose body fat if necessary, to come second, third and fourth in the pecking order, put our careers on hold, sacrifice sleep," writes Hodson. Marriage is not ultimately necessary, however it is a right and can be used by anyone, but caring for the children is what matters most.

The idea of marriage is complex and involves many issues and rewards. It can involve issues like those in the past three articles: its importance, who has the right to be married, and what and who it is for. Universal thought on marriage is not uniform quite yet, but in the future, it has a chance to be. Couples and individuals get what they put into the marriage or relationship. They must both be willing to make it work, for them and their family.

WORKS CITED

Coontz, Stephanie. "Great Expectations." Miller, Robert K. The Informed Argument. 7^th ed. Boston: Thomas Wadsworth, 2007.

Hodson, Phillip. "Baby, This Is For Ever." Miller, Robert K. The Informed Argument. 7^th ed. Boston: Thomas Wadsworth, 2007.

Rauch, Jonathan. "A More Perfect Union." Miller, Robert K. The Informed Argument. 7^th ed. Boston: Thomas Wadsworth, 2007.