What to Expect when Writing Inmates

Inmates are surrounded by environments filled with oppressive rules and distrust on a daily basis. Because of this, your inmate pen pal may display a wide range of emotions during the time you correspond with him or her. This is to be expected and is normal. Your focus is to remain positive as this gives the inmate hope and a feeling of empowerment over mental attitude despite the situations they face daily.

Many times an inmate is just happy to have someone on the outside to talk to. They may tell you their life story, talk about interests and hobbies they had before they were locked up or talk about their families. You may get questions about your family and hobbies and so forth. Answer as much as you feel comfortable talking about.

Periodically, you may get someone, who at first, seems genuine in wanting a pen pal relationship or friendship only to find one day, the inmate has suddenly demanded you do certain things for them. This can include sending money, magazine subscriptions, items such as shoes or crayons or looking up information about other people they may know or even trying to contact others such as estranged family members. Never give into these requests. If you find an inmate pen pal stops writing because you won't give into these requests, then it's best to end the relationship anyway. There are plenty of inmates who sincerely want a pen pal relationship and won't ask a thing of you in return outside of taking the time to genuinely write back. Remember, that prison systems always provide an inmate with basic necessities for free including clothing, food and toiletries. Everything else is either not allowed or already has a proper chain of command to go through. All inmates are provided with an inmate manual when they arrive at the prison outlining rules, regulations and procedures for getting their needs met.

Inmates cannot always write back due to a lack of paper and envelopes or no money for stamps. Inmates are also moved without notice and mail is often not forwarded. The prison mail system receives the mail, reads most of it and then forwards it on to the inmates. There is a delay of 3 to 5 business days beyond normal processing times. If you don't get any response within a month, try writing again. Always obey prison mail facility rules. Never send stickers, use address labels, send Polaroids or hard-backed books.

If you're able to verify the the inmate's location, keep writing even if you don't hear back in a timely fashion. Your letters will encourage and uplift the person to a degree where hope is reinstalled into their life in some manner of speaking. Sometimes, it's just knowing letters are coming from someone on the outside world that gives the inmate motivation to follow through on personal development, to make positive choices and to otherwise put themselves back on the road to rehabilitation whereas they may have just talked themselves out of it otherwise.