What Can You Do When a Friend Oversteps Their Bounds?

I have never been in love with a friend's guy, but I have been on the other side of the fence. Three years ago, my best friend Jenny admitted she was in love with my boyfriend. The feelings this revelation produced in me were scary. I was angry with her, I was hurt, I grew to not trust her. Ultimately, her honesty ended our friendship.

When I met Jenny, I had been with my boyfriend for several years. I immediately developed a bond with Jenny. She had a rough life at home. She had a small daughter, a boyfriend who would not get a job, and she had a hearing impairment. I wanted to help Jenny in any way I could. When her boyfriend would get drunk and abusive with her, she knew my door was open to her, and her daughter. I helped her pay her rent; I gave her grocery money every week. I loved Jenny, like she was my family as well as my best friend. I seriously would have done anything to help Jenny.

As time went on, Jenny spent more time in my home. I gave her a spare room, so she and her daughter would be comfortable in my home. Jenny's daughter really adored my boyfriend. Jenny began to take a lot more interest in my boyfriend. I should tell you, my dear is an Eagle Scout, a gentleman, and a great friend. He also felt sorry for Jenny. He was not thrilled to have her around constantly, but he dealt with it.

Everything was great for a while. I continued to help Jenny with her rent, I gave her rides to anywhere she needed to go, I tried to be a great friend. I sacrificed my personal time to give the girls a better life. One day, I got a call that really changed everything. I got a great job, 1300 miles away. My boyfriend and I began making plans to relocate. I sat Jenny down and explained to her that although I would be away, I would still help her with her bills. She said "Well, can we go too?" I said "No, Jenny I can't move you in with us. I am sorry." Jenny did not take it too well. After a few days I learned she had called my boyfriend and begged him to stay. At first I thought she thinks I will stay if he does. How sweet.

Well, that was not exactly the case. A week later, she called and asked if my boyfriend could come over and fix her sink, it was leaking she explained. My boyfriend went to her apartment, to help her. This is where things really went wrong. There was no leak, she was undressed when he arrived. He came home within 10 minutes. He told me what had happened. I called Jenny and said "We need to talk Jenny, this is crazy!" Jenny explained her true feelings. "I am in love with him! We are meant for each other. It is not fair that he is with you! You have everything!"

I was hurt, angry, confused. How long had she felt this way? Was she using me to get to him? Why would she act like this after all I had done for her?

We were getting ready to move, packing our Uhaul rental, when I last saw Jenny. She came over and openly started flirting with my boyfriend, when he asked her to show me some respect, she laughed and said "How much will she respect you when I give birth to your child? I am pregnant, isn't this the best news you have ever heard?!"

Of course, this was not true. We moved away, and Jenny continued to call, and email us. Eventually I just could not take it anymore, and I had to get rude to get her to leave us alone.

If you are in love with your best friend's guy, then she obviously isn't really your best friend. If she was you would care about her, and respect her enough to back off. If you are fighting these feelings, maybe you should distance yourself to save your friendship. If he felt the same way he would be with you.