What to Do If You're Under-dressed for a Special Event

It's happened to me. I attended the wedding of one of my husband's coworkers, and discovered, on my arrival, that I was seriously underdressed. I certainly wasn't dressed like a slouch; I was wearing a sleeveless sweater dress with a matching jacket, hose, and (some say) sexy, high heeled boots. After all, it was frigid outside and I don't like to be cold. I figured I was dressed perfectly fine for a cold, winter wedding. Then I was surprised, slightly amused, and rather disappointed to discover it was a black tie /suit event. Most folks couldn't have cared less about what I was wearing. It just wasn't that important. But there were a few snide remarks and sideways glances that told me that somebody cared. I spent the evening chatting with the people who didn't care and avoiding the people who did. I still had a good time, and five plus years later, I'm pretty sure the only person who actually remembers is....me. And I've only thought about it enough to share the event with you, so you know what to do if it happens to you.

Unless you always keep a cocktail dress stashed in your glove compartment, there's not much you can do about it if it should happen to you. So just stop. Take a deep breath and don't panic! It's happened to all of us at some time or another, and most of the time, there are no repercussions. Even the most gossipy girls will forget about it in a few days when the next fashion-crime is committed. And truthfully, there will pretty much always be someone dressed more outrageously, more casually, and more fancy than you are so just do the best you can, apologize if you must, and don't worry about it.

When you do find yourself glaringly underdressed at a swanky soiree, calmly excuse yourself and when no one is watching, high tail it to the nearest ladies room. Once again, breathe. Then, let yourself giggle because everyone else will be way jealous of you in your comfy clothes while they are limping around in itchy dresses, hosiery, and high heels. Once you've recovered from the shock of your minor faux-pas, relax and get to work.

If you manage to have some fancy clothes or shoes in your car or your BFF's oversized totebag, now would be a great time to go and get them. (Later, if anyone asks why you changed, just say you were so excited about getting to the party you just couldn't bear to stop and change your clothes! Laugh, then compliment the venue, the food, and the beauty of the hostess and everything will be just fine.) Put on the dressiest thing you have at your disposal, and shed anything you can, while maintaining decency, that is frumpy, dirty, and otherwise inappropriate. If you find yourself in jeans and a hoodie, well, just do the best you can.

Tuck in your shirt tails, as a neat appearance will always look better than a sloppy one. Or, leave your shirt untucked but tie a pretty scarf around your waist as a belt. Comb your hair. If it's too messy, clip it up in a loose bun, or tie it back with anything you can find (rubber band, piece of string) into a low ponytail. Leave out a tiny section of hair at the base to wrap around the ponytail holder to make it look sophisticated. Add a bit of bling if you can find it - a small conversation starter to keep the eyes off of your clothes - such as a pretty flower, a shiny bauble, or a cool barrette that got left in the bottom of your purse.

Put on a little makeup. Bronzer can be used as eye shadow, Vaseline as lip gloss, and lipstick can double as cream blush for a warm, flushed look. Mascara is a great way to freshen up your look, so hopefully you've got some in your gym bag somewhere!

Now, for the hard part. Look in the mirror. Square your shoulders, and stand up straight. Remind yourself that your best values are not in how you look or how you dress, but are in who you are. Confidence and grace are for more elegant, stylish, and beautiful than any old cocktail dress. Smile, relax and go have a great time!