What is it like to Have a Child in the Armed Forces?

As our prayers and hopes go out to our men and women in the armed forces, let's take a look into the daily life of a mother with children in active duty. I have been fortunate to meet a wonderful woman that has been very willing to share her experiences with me. She has two children in the armed forces and still has room to help others. Please meet military mom, Carla Branton.

Kat: Please tell me about your son, Derek and any other family members in the military that involved in the war over seas and here in the United States.
Carla: Derek was at Al Asad Airfield (the second largest airbase in Iraq, is located in northern Iraq approximately 180 kilometers West of Baghdad) last year, he is due to deploy next month for his second tour. My daughter in law, PFC Morgan Branton, is in the Army at Ft. Hood, she was going to deploy to help fight some of the fires in Utah, but she has not left yet. My best friend's son, CPL Chris Hajduk is on his second tour, he is with a LAV unit and he is only able to call home about every three weeks. One of my son's friends was KIA (killed in action), April 9th, 2004, LCPL Chance Phelps, so Derek went to boot camp in Oct of 04. My father is retired Army and my husband is a USMC Veteran.

Kat: After you spend at least 18 years caring for and protecting your child, how do you manage your feelings when you have no way to care for or protect them after they are deployed?
Carla: You put them in GOD's hands, and pray. I have become much deeper in my religious convictions.

Kat: Are there things you do on a regular basis that you would not be doing if Derek were not in active military duty?
Carla: I am on several email lists for support groups; I also belong to one site where we do condolence/memory books for the "fallen Marine" families. I am working on my 5th book. I will probably stay with this, as it is a way to let the family know that their loved one will never be forgotten. I talk a lot with other military families. Since Derek was hurt in boot camp, he spent time in the MRP unit while his broken foot healed. This happened at Christmas and I found there is a group that does Patriotic stockings with cards, letters, and Phone cards in them. This is a group of Marine Moms Online.

Kat: How much are you able to communicate with Derek and by what method?
Carla: When Derek was at the Air Base in Al Asad and his duty is to keep power on to the towers for the planes and choppers to come in and out for missions. He had his own computer at Al Asad.......but you have to be ready for those....I still have the one that he wrote "Mom, I was almost obsolete! I had a rocket go right over my head!" So now I tear up when the national anthem is sung, and you hear the "rocket's red glare". And Derek says that is so true! I also sent phone cards and his unit had a line to the states, so I was very lucky with as often as I got to hear from him.

Kat: What does it mean to you to be a military parent?
Carla: Knowing what my son's job is; he may get killed! I am very proud of my son. How many sons, sign up at 17, and tell you that "I made the right decision for the freedom of my family, my friends and myself."

Kat: Do you think that military parents have the resources they need?
Carla: I know that some branches have much more than other branches available. The National Guard seems to have parents with more unanswered questions from some of my support groups that I have attended.

Kat: Do you have any suggestion for the public on what they can do to help/support the soldiers?
Carla: Write a supportive note and there are many groups that do mailings, and just do it from the heart.....and prayers!
A few sites people might want to consider are Military Missions Online, Homefront Heroes and Marine Families Online in Action is a yahoo group. They welcome new members. Just email them. MFO_In_Action@yahoogroups.com. In addition there is Operation Hero Miles and Operation Military Pride.

Kat: Is there anything that the public can do to help/support family members of soldiers?
Carla: Just ask if they are doing ok, do not tell us that we need to bring them home! We know that Derek has to go next month! Do not ask us why we have to go to funeral for the (soldiers) that are not relatives, understand that we may not sleep for days, why we may have our cell phones on 24/7! If I get a call from Iraq and I do not go out to the hall, I could get fired! My boss feels that there is NO reason why cell phones need to be on in the office! I do not want to try up the office phone line, and I would melt if I knew I missed a call when the phone was busy!

Kat: Do you have any idea when Derek will be returning home after his second tour?
Carla: Derek will be over there for 7-8 months.

Kat: What is your opinion on how the media portrays this war?
Carla: They portray all the negative! You do not get to see the new schools, the happy Iraq children, the new wells that are drawn for SAFE drinking. You do not see the happy Iraq people that are so appreciative of their NEW Freedom! They do not give reports on the successful operations, how many weapons, and materials for IEDs that our boys and girls find. I am angry that the fight for Iraq Freedom is a political measure! I feel the "retired generals" who speak out should not, they are not THERE!

Let us all remember the men and women that are serving our country so proudly, but also the family members of these brave individuals. Let us all do what we can to support these families.