What No on Prop 8 Means to Me

I remember the day the California Supreme Court decided to lift the ban on gay marriage. It was a warm evening in Santa Barbara, and I was standing on the steps of the Courthouse, overlooking the wide green lawns into the sunset, photographing the smiles and tears of the over 100 people who had gathered to commemorate this victory on the path toward equality. May 15, 2008 was a day of hope and celebration.

A lesbian couple sat on the grass as they listened to the mayor's speech, one woman grinning and squeezing her significant other's hand, who was hugging their son in her lap. I remember thinking, "what a happy family."

Fast-forward a little more than five months and optimism about gay rights was replaced by protests, rallies, and marches led by students, citizens, and friends who were angry and hurt by the passing of Prop 8.

May 2009, I found myself at Storke Plaza on the UC Santa Barbara campus waving and cheering at all the couples symbolically getting married at the 19^th annual Queer Wedding. It was a three-hour long mass wedding, presided over by the Vice Chancellor of Student Affairs, with the purpose of showing that everyone should have the right to get married. Hundreds of students walked down the aisle, some carrying roses, some carrying each other, all of them showing their support.

And now yesterday, Aug. 4, will be known as the day that restored hope for human rights. Sure, a lot more steps must be taken before gay marriage becomes permanently legal in California, and with any luck, in the U.S. But, I now know there is a chance for true liberty and justice for all in this country.

Civil rights, women's rights, gay rights-it affects me. I was brought up Catholic, I went to Catholic school for 12 years, but I still don't understand why people discriminate against homosexuals. In school I was taught to love and respect everyone, so why should it change if someone is gay?

Bradford Hogge, a good friend and homosexual hailing from Simi Valley, CA, said that gay marriage seems like it should be a simple issue, but because of so much funding from conservatives, it may be an infinite battle. At age 21, Brad told me that although he does not want to actually get married yet, he does want the ability to marry.

To him, marriage is not always so cut and dry. Some people are more bisexual, and right now, homosexual men can marry women and father children, but they cannot marry and have a family with people they're actually attracted to and could love, he said.

"I feel like [marriage] is so much more complicated that to tell someone that marriage is exclusive to people it's not entirely exclusive to [...] is ridiculous," he said. "We can't have such strict limitations that only allow heterosexuals to be married. That doesn't stop homosexuality and that doesn't stop the complexity of marriage. It doesn't make sense."

Because of Prop 8, Brad is only cautiously optimistic about Judge Walker's ruling. And I don't blame him. We always seem to take baby steps when it comes to change; I guess not everyone took Obama's campaign slogan so seriously.