What Not to Do This Thanksgiving - Not Under Any Circumstances!

Yay! Thanksgiving time! Food, family and laughter...or maybe food, family and a bit of feuding. Looking for tips on how to get that perfect turkey or where to get place settings? That's already been overdone - like that turkey Aunt Bessie made last year - the one you covered in gravy and pretended to enjoy. So, maybe people do need a few pointers. You've heard what you should do a million times. Here's what not to do on Thanksgiving - not under any circumstances. Lucky for you, myself and a few others from around the U.S. have tried (and failed) at some things so you don't have to.

Don't dress the kids up too fancy. Take it from me - a mom of four who knows. You'll spend more time getting frustrated over their clothing than having fun. Of course you don't want them in rags. But don't put on anything you'll be upset at them spoiling. This rule especially applies to parents of smaller children. It is Thanksgiving...where there is food...and kids...learned this the hard way with my first child. Let's just say her fluffy dress was no more and neither were two more outfits that day.

Don't use soap on the bird! Apparently, some people need this lesson. Rene Wolf in Myrtle Beach, S.C. reflects back to her younger years: "When it says wash the bird, it does not mean bathe it in the sink with Joy dishsoap. Yep, did it! My first dinner cooked all by myself at 18. My mom was talking me through it on the phone and told me to wash it, so I did! PS, it takes forever to get lemon scented dishsoap off a turkey."

Don't forget about the game! Zac Wassink of Hoboken, N.J. says do not "schedule dinner during game time. That's what halftimes are for." He does have a point. You can't go back to the office not knowing what happened with the Thanksgiving game. Besides, who knows what will be coming out of people's mouths if they eat Thanksgiving dinner during the game. Chow down at half time to get revved up for the second half. Then, go back for more when the game's over.

Don't cook the inner bag. Kim Remesch from Baltimore, Md. has some hands-on experience with this. "When using a store-bought turkey, look for that SECOND bag inside the turkey. I knew to get that one with the body organs out. I was 19 and eager to please; I commenced to getting my first turkey in the oven. Along the way, there was that odd odor--the second bag with the neck and the like. Yikes. Everyone was forgiving."

Don't take out the turkey with just one hand! Yikes! Take it from Kay Balbi in Windsor Locks, Conn. "When taking turkey off grill, use two hands. Cooked turkey's don't bounce when they hit the ground, contrary to popular belief." Apparently, she knows this from personal experience. At least the dogs will enjoy that meal. Hopefully, they'll prevent you from having to clean up too much of a mess.

Don't mix milk with cranberries! Sandra Hoffman of Portland, Maine knows all about this. Unfortunately for her, the lesson came about the hard way. "If the cranberry sauce (from a can) is what's on your table this year and you are also drinking milk with your dinner, do not -- under any circumstances -- take a bite of cranberry and then a drink of milk. It may just ruin your appetite and no one wants that on the best eating holiday of the year!"

Related Articles from Lyn Lomasi:

Activities to Keep Large Groups of Kids Busy on Thanksgiving
8 Thanksgiving Craft Projects for First Graders
Printable Thanksgiving Family Games: Fun for Kids and Adults