What Do I Say when My Child Asks If There Really is a Santa Claus?

There are one of two reasons why you are reading this article. The first being that your child has recently asked you if there really is a Santa Claus. The second being that you know there is no way in heck your child should still believe in Santa yet the fantasy has persisted. Let's begin with the easiest scenario to tackle. That would be the latter situation. This is something I remember experiencing vividly as a child. I knew by the time I was ten that there was no way a man could circumvent the whole earth and leave presents at every house before dawn. The problem with disclosing that I knew Santa was imaginary was that the presents were very real. I mistakenly thought that if I let the cat out of the bag that maybe Santa's bag would be empty as well. In my naivete I did not take in the whole situation. It did not register with me that adults were getting gifts as well and they most surely knew that Santa Claus was a fiction. It further eluded me that parents were the pseudo Santa's but that only lasted for one year. By, the next Christmas I had all the angles figured out. Mom would start shopping and mysteriously be unable to take any of us kids with her. In a family of ten children it was not common for my mother to be anywhere without half a dozen kids trailing her. The overabundance of Santa stand-ins became ridiculous to me at this time as well.

As a kid we are supposed to believe that a man can miraculously deliver presents to every house in every country. Yet, he cannot figure out how to be in every mall and every store chain on a rotating basis. Here was a very big chink in the Santa suit for me. The Santa foundation was crumbling and when I was eleven I leveled it with the force of a Rockem Sockem Robot. Unfortunately, I chose to make my announcement in front of the little ones who were still dreaming of sugar plums. Not a good thing to do. My mother was furious and had to do some fancy footwork to repair the damage that I almost did to my younger siblings. The moral of this tale is if you have older children that seriously cannot still believe in Santa and there a wee ones underfoot it is time for a sit down. Let them know that you know what they know so the little kids can go on not knowing until it is their time to know of what we speak. This is what the Santa Claus belief is all about. It is like belonging to a secret society when you are a child and you want your child to stay there until it's time to embrace the truth.

Which leads to the first reason that may bring you to this article. Your child has begun the familiar line of questioning. "Mom, how can Santa Claus make all the toys and get them to everyone in one night"? The first thing you can do is to answer that question with a question. This enables you to get a little bit deeper into what your child is ready to hear or what they truly believe. You may ask, "well, how do think Santa can get all that done in one night"? If you child answers the question with a pretty plausible explanation than it isn't time to take the magic out of the season just yet. One of the workable explanations a child could deduce is that all the "helper Santa's" must continue to help on Christmas Eve as well.This is a very intelligent solution for a child to come up with and shows that they are not ready to concede to outside pressure that Santa may not be real. Speaking of outside pressure once a child is questioning it is usually because he has found himself in the middle of two camps among his peers. The "believers camp and the "non-believers" camp of Santa Claus.

This is a very difficult position for a child to be in. If you have a third grader you may be in this situation right now. As a rule girls hang on to the magical Santa Claus longer than the boys. Perhaps it's because girls are more emotional than boys. A boy can pretty much shrug off his Santa Claus fantasy with a macho attitude. "I knew Santa wasn't real all along'! This is a common tactic a boy takes to disguise his disappointment and save face in front of his mates. If you have a girl on the other hand have some Puffs Plus on hand in case of a melt down. This is also good for the moms. As a mom I cannot tell you how intensely sad I was to learn that the last of my four children no longer believed in Santa Claus.

When you become a parent that is when Christmas becomes magical again. It allows us to tap in to those wonderful childhood memories and bring them back to life. The joy of waiting for the kids to fall asleep as we sneak the gifts under the tree. Gobbling the Christmas cookies and milk left out for Santa and leaving a trail of crumbs to the door. (We never had a fireplace). Making reindeer footprints in flour outside even when there was no snow. Getting caught up in the whole season again through the eyes of a child is fantastic fun. You may be tempted to keep the Santa Claus fantasy going longer than is healthy for your child who is ready to move on. It is good to analyze the feeling behind this. As adults there pretty much isn't a smidge of magic and wonder left anywhere in this world for us. Letting go of Santa (again) is hard. The first time we were children and it is usually a Christmas that was not much fun for us. The second time we have to let go is when our children do. It's difficult all over again but for different reasons. It means our children are growing and we cannot hold them back. We want to keep them small, innocent and safe in our arms forever. That is not possible and when Santa is left behind it may feel like our children are moving away from us. In a way they are but it is a healthy move all the same.

A funny thing happened to us a couple of years ago. We became grandparents and low and behold as sure as the Christmas Star shines Santa Claus was resurrected. It came as quite a surprise. I hadn't even thought of that aspect of grandparenthood. Imagine my delight in realizing that we got to go a few more rounds with Santa Claus after all! The joy of getting to jump head first all over again into the magic of Christmas. It is actually more sacred this time because we know how fleeting these years will be. The awareness that all of life is indeed a circle is tangible. Santa Claus comes and Santa Claus goes and if you wait long enough sometimes he comes around again just when you least expect him. Maybe the best way to answer the question of the existence or not of Santa is in this way. There are times when he is real and there are times when he just isn't. If you are talking to a ten year old just ask them to be patient. It would seem that Santa Claus always is real somewhere for someone.