What to Say and Do If Your Teenage Daughter is Pregnant

1. Do not get upset or angry. For most parents, it comes as a shock when they find out that their teen daughter is expecting, but the worst thing that you as a parent can do is yell or say unkind things to your daughter. She is already facing a major life change and needs to feel loved, not humiliated.

2. Do not play the shame game. Do not make your daughter feel badly about what has happened. She is carrying your grandchild, and regardless of the situation, the little person inside of your daughter is a blessing.

3. Talk to your daughter about her feelings regarding the pregnancy. How does she feel? Is she scared? Happy? Confused? Let her know that her feelings are natural, and discuss with her what she would like to do about her situation. Does she want to keep and raise the baby? Does she want to consider adoption for the baby? Let her know that you love her and plan to support her in the decision that she makes. As always should be the case, keep the lines of communication open and let her tell you how involved that she would like for you to be in helping her prepare for the baby and assisting her with the care of the baby once he or she arrives.

4. Find out if your daughter wishes to seek an educational alternative during her pregnancy if she is in public school. Homebound tutors or homeschooling are wonderful options during a situation such as this.

5. Provide healthy food for your daughter and your unborn grandchild. Help your daughter find some good prenatal vitamins that will provide further nutrients for both her and the baby. This author recommends Nature's Way Prenatal Vitamins. They are the ones that she used during her recent pregnancy.

6. Accompany your daughter to doctor's (or midwife's) appointments, sonograms, or any other prenatal care activities. She will need moral support during her pregnancy, and your presence at these appointments will also help you to bond further with your daughter as well as your unborn grandchild.

7. Help your daughter to prepare for the baby's arrival by purchasing supplies that will be needed once the baby arrives. Throw a baby shower for your daughter, and assist her in setting up a nursery for the baby.

8. Be willing to be with your daughter during the labor and delivery of your grandchild if she so desires. Moral support and coaching during labor makes all the difference in the world, particularly when one does not know what to expect.

9. Once the baby is born, help your daughter with learning how to care for the baby (i.e. diaper changing, feeding, bathing, dressing, etc.) If your daughter has chosen to breastfeed, and you have never done so, find a good lactation consultant or midwife who can coach her in this effort. Support her in this endeavor by encouraging her not to give up the first few days while she is waiting for her milk to come in.

10. Assist your daughter with caring for your new grandchild. Help to give her some breaks, so she can properly heal and recover from the birth.

11. Accompany your daughter to the baby's medical checkups, and let her know what to expect.

12. Be your daughter's friend and advocate, and be thankful for your new grandchild.