What Type of Friend Are You - Flower or a Weed ?

Dragonfly
The greatest gift we give ourselves is the gift of a good friend. There is nothing like being able to share good times and bad times with folks we know who genuinely care about us. Sometimes friendships go through stages caused by life happenings, and sometimes we have to change the relationship we have with someone.

We all know someone who has alot going on with their life. It may be a divorce, sick and elderly parent, financial concerns, etc... If you are that person, and you spring all the daily news on your friend, sometimes it can be overwhelming. Sometimes, you need to take a step back and not make the conversation all about you. It tends to become a soap opera type relationship. We don't want to bring a dark cloud over the time we have to spend with our friend.

The type of friend we should all strive to be is a flower. This could mean that we are nice to be around, we are a positive person, always encouraging those around us, we are always blooming with thoughts and ideas to help one another.

We know there are friends who would come in under the weed category. These folks tend to be invasive with their needs, not helpful to us, worried more about how we can help them instead of them helping us, and you have to struggle to see what they do for the friendship.

We believe that weeds can become flowers if they choose to. But they have to decide to change.

We are not saying to not be a sounding board for your friends. What we are saying is don't become a doormat. We should feel a nice feeling after spending time with friends. It should not leave you drained and weary. You may find that the friendship has changed and that it is toxic to stay in for whatever reason. Trust your intuition, it can be a clear indication that things have changed.

You may also find that a little distance can help as well. If you find you cannot handle all of the current baggage your friend is involved in, maybe a little time apart will help the relationship.

The best kind of friend to be is the kind of friend you yourself would want. We want to be encouraged and supported in our friendships. We want to give help and kindness when needed. Be interested in your friends. Be a flower!

Published by Dragonfly

5O YR OLD WANTING TO SHARE ALL THAT I KNOW ABOUT LIVING WITH DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND DECIDING TO BREAK FREE OF IT AFTER A 30 YR MARRIAGE. I CURRENTLY HOLD 2 JOBS TO SURVIVE AND HAVE ALOT OF EMPATHY AND COMPASS...  View profile

1 Comments

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  • Alyce Rocco8/19/2007

    Great analogy. I definietly had to weed the friendship garden to make room for more flowers. Some weeds do have little flowers, but others want to take up all the room, suck up all the water without giving much in return.

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