What Type of Parenting Style Do You Use?

Many parents just parent without putting much thought into it, but in reality there are actually many different parenting styles. Maybe you parent just as your parents did, vowed to be the exact opposite of your parents, or you may be a mix of the two. Did you know exactly what type of parenting style your own parents were using? Do you know what type you yourself are using? Here we are going to look into three different styles of parenting.

I have found there are 3 main types of parenting styles and quite a few other styles that seem to be taken from the main styles.

Authoritarian Style

This style of parenting is described as the order giver. Do you just tell your children what to do without discussion, have you ever said the phrase "because I said so that is why", or do you expect your children to just do whatever you ask of them, not giving them a chance to ask why? If you said yes to any of these then you can be sure you use some of the authoritarian style within your parenting. Some children with authoritarian parents do not learn to think for themselves nor do they understand why one or both of their parents are requiring certain behaviors. Some of these children tend to be withdrawn socially. As you can see this parenting style has a few draw backs. One plus for this parenting style could be that children with authoritarian parents tend to perform better in school due to their disciplined upbringing. I myself have used the "because I said so" phrase and I would have never thought it was within this style of parenting.

Permissive Style

This style is more commonly known as the indulgent or friend style of parenting. Do you tend to give in to your children, maybe you have very few or no set rules in your house, or do you have low expectations for your children? Parents who are in within the permissive style really just want their children to like them at the end of the day and have little or no real control over their children. Some children of permissive parents suffer from a lack of focus, are immature, or have problems regulating their emotions. Children with indulgent parents usually can not control their impulses and also will not accept the responsibility for their own actions. A plus for the permissive parenting style would be that even though they are very lenient, they also are more aware and show a commitment to engage with their children. I myself don't really fit in with style, although I may give my children quite a lot, I only do that when they show good behavior.

Authoritative Style

This style has also been known as the democratic style. Authoritative parenting is the ideal style. With this style the parent is demanding yet welcomes questions about those demands, they have expectations about how their children should behave but make them behave in a way that is not too demanding. Children of Authoritative parents usually show more emotional control and have a better disposition about them. Some children that have authoritative parents tend to be happy with themselves and are generous with others. I myself fall into this style more than the others. I do expect my children to act a certain way at certain times, even though sometimes it just does not happen. I try to always reward them when they are good and not give in when they are not behaving the way I would like.

Looking at these different parenting styles I believe even more that many of us fall somewhere in the middle or have a good mix of all the styles. I feel it is good to have boundaries and expectations for our children while also letting them be kids and find out some things for themselves.

Resources:

http://www.lifematters.com/parenting_styles.asp

http://pediatrics.about.com/od/infantparentingtips/a/04_pntg_styles.htm

http://typesofparentingstyles.com/