What Are Your Views on Parenting and Disciplining a Child?

Lately parenting skills and styles of discipline are being discussed in the public arena, due to several extreme parenting cases. Outcries of child abuse are being heard. How were you disciplined as a child by your parent, and what are your views on parenting and disciplining a child correctly? Are parents totally lost in raising children in our frantic, high tech world? When a child is handed to us, at birth or adoption, he or she doesn't come along with a book about correct parenting, so where do we draw our parenting methods from? Could it all lie in the parenting method you were raised with? Sometimes common sense and an irrational child clash, initiating a serious parenting dilemma.

In many cultures methods of parenting and disciplining a child vary. On January 11^th, a book titled, "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom," by Amy Chua, came out, sharing her story as a mother regarding parenting and discipline methods, raising her two daughters, Lulu and Sophia. Public discussion is rampant regarding this Asian mother and her seemingly extreme conservative methods. For example, her daughters were not allowed sleepovers or play dates and were often verbally berated into performing at their best. Nothing less was ever accepted. The Asian culture tends to hold a more traditional and stricter mode in parenting and disciplining children. Amy Chua is married to Jed Rubenfeld, a Yale Law school professor, who has stated he doesn't totally agree with his wife's methods, but allowed her to set the rules. Amy Chua's parenting and disciplining styles are being questioned on whether they cross the line into blatant child abuse.

In November of 2010, Dr. Phil had a mother named Jessica Beagley on his show. Jessica Beagley is a mother of six children who lives in Alaska and contacted Dr. Phil, confessing she can't handle parenting and disciplining her children. In a video she is seen disciplining her seven year old adoptive son by overbearingly berating him face to face, pouring hot sauce in his mouth and administering an ice cold shower, all while the young child is screaming. Her husband is a police officer. Jessica Beagley is now being investigated for allegations of child abuse. Was she an out of control mother and does she deserve jail time for her parenting and disciplining methods?

Sadly and despicably a Floridian mother named Julie Schenecker shot her sixteen year old daughter and thirteen year old son, confessing she shot them because she was tired of her children talking back with mouthy mouths. Julie Schenecker was arrested and sent to a hospital from jail because of an unknown emotional problem. Julie's husband was overseas serving in the military, and was called him for his children's funeral. An out of control mother due to stress, drugs or alcohol, we don't know. Is Julie Schenecker a mother who lost all sense of boundaries in disciplining and parenting? It still doesn't excuse her horrific behavior.

There are parents who believe parenting skills mean catering to your children's every whim without any discipline or rules. Can this be producing a generation of spoiled adults who believe the world should be handed to them? Today there are more out of control children, and children who are living in dysfunctional homes. It's not known whether these children's behaviors are becoming worst because of our generation being more lax in parenting and disciplining skills. There are also more stressed, exhausted parents and sadly more abusive parents.

I don't have the answer on the perfect parenting and disciplining method. I was raised within a family culture believing you, "spare the rod and spoil the child." Belts and straps were used to discipline, I wear the welts today. For my parenting and disciplining method, I didn't follow my family's idea and my children turned out great. "Time Outs," is what the television personality, Jo from the ABC, "The Supernanny," believes. She turns dysfunctional parenting and disciplining skills around.

Tiger Mom or Octomom? What is the correct parenting and disciplining method? I do believe it should always start and end with love.

You can read Time Magazine's interview with Amy Chua about her parenting and disciplining style at the following link.

http://healthland.time.com/2011/01/11/chinese-vs-western-mothers-q-a-with-amy-chua/

You can view the You Tube video of Jessica Beagley describing and showing her parenting and disciplining style at the following link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gkYIjQceoRs&feature=player_embedded

ABC News video on Julie Schenecker's story is at link below.

http://abcnews.go.com/US/julie-schenecker-florida-mother-accused-killing-mouthy-kids/story?id=12793507