What to Wear on a Date (For Men)

So, you're going on your first date? I am assuming you have already sealed the deal and picked a day, chose several locations, planned out the activities that will most likely happen on the date, and of course made multiple backup plans for all of the above. If you have not done all of those then best of luck. This is not the guide on how to pick a day, chose a location, plan what to do, or how to make a backup plan. This is the guide where I am going to tell you step by step how to look your best and impress your date by focusing on the frequently overlooked essentials.

Hygiene

Let's get right into it. How has your hygiene been lately buddy? Don't worry you're just reading this from a screen. You do not have to openly admit whether or not you have skipped a shower or 3, ran out of deodorant, have not been keeping up on your laundry, have not groomed your body hair in some time, or you do not brush your teeth after every meal.

The point I'm getting at with that question is simple. Being clean is absolutely pivotal for you to have a successful date! My advice is of course to keep up with great hygiene on a regular basis. Let's face it though, we all have jobs and days off where we just don't have the time or energy to be 100% hygienic at all hours.

For those of you who are reading this and are scoffing saying "yea yea I take care of myself and I'm clean who cares" I just want to ask when was the last time a friend or friend's girlfriend hugged you and complimented you on the way you smelled, how about someone who told you that you look nice, or even someone you walk by stops what they are doing to look at you (and not in a menacing way)? Hygiene can do this for you. We are all happier and more confident when we are clean, and it is proven by psychologists (I took notes in class on this) that confidence and happiness are magnetic. You will have a better date by taking care of your body beforehand.

So first things first, here is a simple list of hygienic efforts and grooming habits that you should go through before your date. I advise starting these regularly at least a few days before your date, so you will be at peak performance. (I may not have covered absolutely everything, so feel free to comment and add advice on proper hygiene for your fellow man)

1. Scrub every bit of hair on your body vigorously with shampoo and conditioner. This will help you avoid dry scalp and any dander appearing on your cloths.

2. Buy a pouf or a loofah (and replace them once they start to get stretched out or dingy). Some guys out there are scoffing at this and want to stay true to their washcloths, but a pouf or a loofah will scrub your body a lot smoother and make your skin softer than the standard washcloth.

3. Use shampoos, conditioners, body washes, or soaps that are unscented or complimentary if you plan on wearing cologne or body spray. You do not want to smell like 50 different things and come out smelling odd.

4. Clip your fingernails and toenails. You can get all kinds of dirt and funk built up under your nails that almost all people find unsightly, and if you happen to make it to the bedroom you do not want to scrape their legs with your toe talons while attempting a cuddle. A lot of people glance at the hands in order to judge a person's hygiene, so you want them in good form.

5. Clip your nose hairs and ear hairs if you have them. You can easily have a booger hanging from one and not even know. In fact, pick your nose while you're at the sink and make sure nothing will come flying or hanging out during your date, and clean your ears with a Q-tip as well.

6. Shave! Use shaving cream and aftershave that is unscented if you plan on wearing cologne or body spray, or use a scent that is complimentary to your shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. People agree that stubble in some cases is attractive, but it is not good to rub up on. You can keep your facial hair all you like, but just make sure it is neatly groomed and even. I personally have my barber line up my goatee and sideburns every time I go in.

7. Pluck your eyebrows. I think it is a safe bet that most societies enjoy the two eyebrow system, so get rid of any hair in-between the two. Check for long eyebrow hairs as well, eyebrow hairs do not all grow at the same pace and some can get quite long and unflattering.

8. While we are on the topic of hair, groom your lower body as well. This is entirely up to your preference of course, but if your date ends up in you taking your clothes off you do not want to look unkempt. A large tuft of hair above or on your actual genitals is generally less appealing. Again, it is up to the person's preference, but should you choose to groom your lower half you should do it a few days ahead of time in order to eliminate unforeseen razor burn or razor bumps. Check your belly hair as well, they call it a happy trail not a happy highway, but I do know of a couple of people who do enjoy their men to have body hair so do not be entirely discouraged if you choose to keep yours.

9. Check for eye crisps or eye boogers (I do not know the technical term for the white funk that builds up on either side of your eyes when you sleep) and remove them as well as any loose eyelashes.

10. Comb or brush your hair so it looks neat and groomed. The shagged out- stumble out of bed- emo-rebel without a cause look is not going to work in a proper formal setting. Use some hairspray, gel, wax, or palmade to keep it in place.

11. Put on deodorant. You should wear unscented if you plan on wearing cologne. Otherwise, you should choose a deodorant that compliments your shampoo, conditioner, and body wash.

12. If you are wearing cologne or body spray then you should know by now that everything cleaning product you have used up until now is either unscented or 100% complimentary. Complimentary scents are using the same axe shower gel, deodorant, and body spray. In order to properly apply body sprays and colognes remember this rule. Do not over do it! Body sprays and colognes are heat activated, so when your body begins to heat up and begin to perspire your body spray or cologne smell becomes stronger. With body spray, all you need is one quick application of a diagonal line from your shoulder to your ribcage and then straight across the back of your shoulders and neck. With colognes, spray the center of your chest once about half an arm's length away, then spray the back of your neck the same, and once you are fully dressed spray the front of your chest one more time. Do not spray any more than this!

A note on choosing a cologne, body spray, body wash, or deodorant: make sure you have sufficient time to try the different scents before you commit to them. Your body has natural oils and a natural scent that will comingle with that of the scented products you put on your body, and the two smells are not always going to come out well. You could end up smelling pungent or perspire more, and that would be very counterproductive to your date. Do your research buddy, I personally have a bottle of Aqua Di Gio by Georgio Armani that makes me sweat and quite frankly smell awful, but I have a less expensive bottle of Happy (for men) by Clinique that I get compliments on daily. Try on free samples of the product before you buy it! Most department stores will give or sell you a small sample to take home and try. Hell, sneak a quick spray of body spray while you're at the department store and see how it works for you for the rest of the night. If you receive compliments then you're on the right track. If you get a hug from a friend or love interest and they quickly come back in for a longer hug then you hit the jackpot.

At this point you should be looking in the mirror and nodding with a bit of smugness. If that is the case, then we are ready to pick out what to wear for your date.

Clothing is all about where you are going and what you are doing once you get there, but also keep in mind what you plan on doing through the rest of the evening.

Underwear (Yes it is important)

Just about every guy in his teens or twenties owns a pair of underwear that is about on its last leg. So they have a small hole or they are faded, no big deal right? Wrong, if your date drops something and you bend down to pick it up do you really want them to see your faded or stretched Simpsons boxer lining? In fact, do not wear underwear with any funny sayings on them or pictures at all. If your date sees you in your underwear you do not want them to be paying more attention to the Monet on the front, and you certainly do not want them to just burst out laughing in the direction of your lower half. Wear simple print or solid color underwear. Boxers, briefs, boxer briefs, or whatever your taste is will be fine. I do not recommend thong underwear on a first date. What if your date wants to go to a party afterwards and you all end up playing strip poker. Do you really want to be that guy?

So my recommendation is simple print or solid color, no thongs, no cartoons or pictures, no jokes, and make sure they are clean, free of holes, and not stretched out. If you have to buy new underwear to accomplish this, just do it and get it over with.

Casual or Formal?

This is a simple problem to solve, if you are going to do anything physically exerting, do not dress formal. If you are going to a place that has a larger beer list than a wine list, do not dress formal. Let me lay out a small list of places you would dress formal.

1. A play, opera, or any live theatre

2. A fine dining restaurant

3. Church (yes, I know of some people who have gone to church on a date)

4. A school or event sponsored dance or ball.

5. If you are taking them out to a club (do it they will love it, and you will be noticed for being well dressed)

It is pretty easy to figure out when to wear formal. If you are unclear on whether or not you should dress formally, call ahead to the locations you are going to and ask the preferred dress code. You should also inform your date that you will be dressing formally if you are going that route. You do not want to show up dressed to the 9's and make your date feel underdressed or sloppy. You should also not overdress to go to casual places. Your date will not be thanking you if they went through considerable lengths to look good and are taken to a loud messy place.

Formal and Semi Formal

I did not own a full suit until I was 25, but I still managed to dress up just fine to go on dates to fine dining and live theatre. If you do not own a suit you should be saving for one as soon as possible, but here is a list of what you can wear in place of a suit. Here is a start to dressing formal.

1. Wear a long sleeve button up shirt. Short sleeves may be more comfortable and may hold that rebel look with a black tie, but you are not out to say I don't care I'm going to be comfortable. You are trying to look professional, so wear the long sleeved button up. Choose simple colors depending on your color of slacks, tie, and skin tone. If you are very pale or very dark skinned you should wear darker colors in my opinion. The darker colors will accent your skin nicely and not make you seem so pale or dark by comparison. If you are more tanned or have more of a mocha complexion you have more freedom with lighter colors, but keep in mind you want to draw attention by looking good not by being a beacon in the room with what you're wearing. I am of the opinion that you should not wear pink! I do not care if it is sexist of me to say that men should not wear pink, but this is a first date. You can let your mouth do all of the feminist and equal opportunity for clothing speeches you want, but try not to make too bold a statement with your choice of color. Please make sure that your shirt is not wrinkled as well. You will look like you just rolled out of bed if your shirt is badly wrinkled. Invest in an ironing board and an iron, or go get your shirt dry-cleaned. Do not buy a shirt, open the package, and wear it the night of your date. Shirts come with wrinkles already in them and they need to be straightened. Make sure your shirt fits you as well. The shirt should not be too tight or too loose. If you cannot afford a name brand shirt, go to a name brand store and get measured by the salesman, and then go to another store and use the measurements you got from the salesman to get a proper fit. You do not want to look like you borrowed your dad's or your best friend's shirt for this date. If all else fails, you can never go wrong for wearing a plain white button up long sleeved shirt.

2. Wear a tie! You have already gone through the trouble of picking out a nice long sleeved button up shirt with a collar, so put on a tie to go with it. People who wear long sleeved button ups without a tie look like they don't care and simply had nothing else to wear that day. When it comes to the pattern and color of the tie I say refer to what we spoke about when it came to underwear. The tie should be a dark color if your shirt is a light color, and your tie can be lighter than your shirt if it is dark. Do not wear a funny tie! It is not that expensive to go to the store and pick up a simple tie that will go with your shirt. Make sure your tie is not wrinkled.

3. Wear some nice pants. If you cannot afford a nice pair of slacks, wear a pair of Dickies style jeans. From a distance, no one will be able to tell you are not wearing slacks. Do not wear obscure colored slacks (like green, light blue). Make sure they are not faded. If you wear dark blue or black slacks try you best to not wear new darks with old darks. Dark colors fade and contrast with one another, so everyone will be able to tell you just got that tie or those pants.

4. Put on some dress shoes. If you do not own dress shoes then polish up the leather on your boots, or clean your newest pair of sneakers to look brand new. I highly recommend owning a pair of leather dress shoes. Polish your dress shoes before you go on your date.

5. Do not wear bright socks. You can wear socks that match your shirt color if you so choose, but it is usually a bad idea to draw attention to your feet. You do not want attention drawn to your feet simply because you may or may not have stepped in something.

6. Wear a belt that matches the color of your shoes.

7. Wear a tie clip and a watch. You will look way more professional by wearing both of these.

8. Do not wear a hat. You are not in the mob, this is not the roaring 20's, you're not a millionaire recording artist, and your favorite team can go one night without your support. I don't care how nice, new, bling, how well the hat matches your digs, or if it covers your receding hairline or bald spot. Do not wear a hat.

If you have accomplished all of this then guess what. The only difference between what you are wearing now and a suit is the slacks and jacket. Your suit jacket should match your slacks perfectly, and both should be tailored to fit you perfectly. Taking a jacket and slacks to a tailor to be fit for you is not expensive. The suit slacks can be worn without the jacket to semi formal events, but if your date involves anything that is absolutely formal you must wear the jacket. You can take the jacket off when you have gone inside, but when you are outdoors put it on.

Here are some things to keep in mind while picking a suit.

1. The color should be universal. Not many people have the money to go around buying up nice suits for every occasion, so you should pick a neutral color that will fit the multiple functions you intend on wearing it to. Black, charcoal, and navy blue are the best options for a universal suit. Black is normally frowned upon since it is such a serious color for a suit, but depending on the person wearing it a black suit can be very complimentary.

2. If your suit has a pattern make sure it is not a prominent one. You want the pattern to be complimentary to the base color of the suit and not overwhelm it.

3. Suits range in how many buttons they have. For the purposes of a date you will want to wear a 2 to 3 button suit. Do not button the bottom button. The bottom button is there for if it is really cold and pretty much just for show anyways.

4. Make sure your jacket and slacks match!

5. Try them on before you buy them! It is imperative that you try on your suit before you buy it to make sure it can be tailored to fit you properly.

6. If you have any questions, ask the salesperson. They are professionals and know that when you leave their store you are advertising their business, and they do not want you to look foolish.

Semi formal can be tricky. I still recommend wearing all of the above, but with one exception. Instead of a suit or shirt and tie, you should wear a nice button up or pull over collared shirt. Be wary though, some people say semi formal and they still mean long sleeved shirt and tie. Be aware of where you are going and the proper dress codes.

Casual

In casual settings such as bars, clubs, chain restaurants, and outdoor events it is always best to just dress normally, but with a small addition or two since this is still a date. By small addition I mean you should wear a nice button up short sleeved shirt instead of a band shirt if you are going out to eat. Just something not so out of your element. On a casual date, you still want to convey that you are comfortable and express yourself, but you want to throw something in there to remind your date that you gave some thought to going out with them.

Here are some do's and do not's for casual dating

1. Do not wear cloths with holes in them. No torn jeans or ratted out shirts.

2. Try not to wear faded or stained cloths.

3. Do not wear any clothing with offensive content on it.

4. Do not go overboard with jewelry. You do not need to show off your individuality by wearing lots of clutter. You have already established yourself as unique otherwise you would not be on this date.

5. Do not wear the shirt of the band you are going to see (quote PCU).

6. Do not wear funny shirts or pants. You're date may be a friend who knows you like wearing shirts with funny sayings, but you want them to notice that you have a sense of humor beyond what you can buy at a store.

7. Wear your favorite boots or shoes, but polish them before you wear them out.

8. Wear a belt, and make sure you wear it on your waist.

9. Do not sag your pants. Girls do not like seeing your boxers or how low your pants can get. I have heard from a lot of women from all different backgrounds, and they all agree that it is not sexy. You want to be sexy.

10. Wear clothes that are flattering. Do not wear tight cloths if you are a bigger guy, and do not wear really loose cloths if you are a skinnier guy. You want to wear clothes that are comfortable, but still show off your assets.

11. Dress comfortably, since it is a casual atmosphere you will be way more laid back and prone to conversation.

12. Do not be afraid to wear shorts if it is an outdoor date.

13. Bring a bathing suit and a towel in the trunk of your car. You never know when you might suddenly decide to go for a swim. Guys who have been on successful dates know what I mean here.

In the end, the best piece of advice I can give is to be yourself. Dress how you feel will be appropriate and use your best judgment. I have gone out of my way before to impress dates, and in the end I was not putting out an accurate statement of who I was. Stay true to your fashion sense, but go with the side of caution when it comes to dates. It is better to be a little more conservative if you are a very liberal individual. People like it when you make effort to please them. If you show that you can shine up nice and are willing to put some effort towards a pleasant evening with your date, then you are already making a good impression.