What a Week it Was... (03-07-08 Edition)

Here are some stories from the past week that I found to be interesting, humorous and/or disgusting, along with a handful of headlines that I could not care less about. Most, if not all, of these stories were reported by the Associated Press (www.ap.org), Reuters (www.reuters.com) or some other credible news source.

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D&D creator dies

Gary Gygax, who co-created the fantasy game Dungeons & Dragons and helped start the role-playing phenomenon, died at his home in Lake Geneva, Wisc. He was 69.

Not since "Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace" have nerds been so upset...

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Another "Idol" shocker

According to various reports, "American Idol" contestant David Hernandez once worked as a stripper at Dick's Cabaret in Phoenix, appearing fully nude and performing lap dances for the club's "mostly male" clientele, club manager Gordy Bryan said. Hernandez's history as a stripper is not likely to disqualify him from the competition.

As much as I hate to admit it, I do watch "Idol." I have a love/hate relationship with it, but, nevertheless, I rarely miss it. But, let's just cut the crap already. Top to bottom, inside and out, the show is fixed and scripted to a tee. Going into each season they know who the Top 12 is going to be and what order they'll be eliminated. They also intentionally pepper the contestant pool with "scandalous" people. Every year some "shocking" story comes out about an "Idol" contestant - and the only things that come from it are boosted ratings and enhanced interest in the show. Producers of the show don't do background checks? Let's stop acting surprised about this hoopla, and simply enjoy "Idol" for what it is - well produced, scripted, drama-filled nonsense that's made to look real. Like professional wrestling...

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Trippin' on the Ten Commandments

Giving new meaning to "high on Mount Sinai," Israeli researcher Benny Shanon claims Moses was on psychedelic drugs when he heard God deliver the Ten Commandments. Such mind-altering substances formed an integral part of the religious rites of Israelites in biblical times, Shanon, a professor of cognitive psychology at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, wrote in the Time and Mind journal of philosophy. "As far Moses on Mount Sinai is concerned, it was either a supernatural cosmic event, which I don't believe, or a legend, which I don't believe either, or finally, and this is very probable, an event that joined Moses and the people of Israel under the effect of narcotics," Shanon said. Moses was probably also on drugs when he saw the "burning bush," suggested Shanon, who said he himself has dabbled with such substances.

Hmmm...so all that stuff I did in college can be written off as "religious experiences"? Excellent...

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Aren't we teaching kids to take turns?

In Natick, Mass., a child's birthday party at a Chuck E. Cheese restaurant was cut short after a fight broke out between two mothers. Natick police said the mom of the 9-year-old birthday boy apparently became enraged because the other woman's son was "hogging" an arcade game. Catherine Aliaga, 38, and Tarsha Williams, 33, both of Boston, will be summoned into court to answer charges of simple assault and battery stemming from the scuffle.

I'm all for manners and sharing, but who hasn't gotten pissed at a 9-year-old for having too much fun at a birthday party? I once bludgeoned a kid because he took my turn of Ms. Pac Man...

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That's not rock-and-roll...

Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards is the new public face of Louis Vuitton, the French luxury fashion house. Richards plans to donate the fee for the ad to the Climate Project, launched by Nobel-winning former U.S. vice-president Al Gore and backed by Louis Vuitton.

That fact that he's giving the money to a good cause eases the sting, but a "Stone" pimping a purse manufacturer? That's just wrong on so many levels...

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More music industry drivel

Ashlee Simpson was allegedly drunk when she appeared on Washington, D.C., station Hot 99.5's Kane in the Morning show this week, reportedly spending a lot of her on-air time giggling and refusing to answer a number of questions, including inquiries about her family and love life. At one point, she seemingly forgot the lyrics to her new tune "Little Miss Obsessive." Both Simpson and her rep deny the claims, chalking her poor showing up to nerves and the uncomfortable vibe she got from the studio staff.

Right...and she lip synched on Saturday Night Live because of acid reflux...

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This is a real story from www.people.com

On Thursday, Jennifer Aniston polished off shooting the movie "Marley & Me" with a lychee martini at Mandarin Oriental's Martini Bar in Miami.

After I finished writing this, I had a turkey sandwich and glass of grape juice at my house in Westlake, Ohio.

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Leave the singing to the professionals

Lindsay Lohan on her upcoming album: "I want it to be dance. I want it to be kind of Kylie Minogue-meets-Rihanna. I hope to tour with it and I hope to really promote it."

Interesting sources of inspiration, Lindsay. Nevertheless, it's going to be more like fingernails scratching a chalkboard-meets-microphone feedback. And you're going to tour? You do realize that your synthesized, studio-enhanced voice won't sound the same on a live microphone, right?

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Exotic eating

In a post on her MySpace blog, Jessica Alba said the following about French cuisine: "Every day I have eaten ham and cheese sandwiches, I can't get enough of them. Wish they had these back in the States."

I know! I wish we had hamburgers and French fries here in the States, too!

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Finally, in "Who gives a shit?" news...

Kenny Chesney leads ACM nominees with 11

Paris Hilton to guest on 'My Name is Earl'

"Real Housewives" take on New York

Miley Cyrus to play rival network's awards show

Dina Lohan's reality show to debut in summer