What is a Winklepicker?

Winklepicker. A funny word, and not just because it twice makes use of the "k" sound, which as we all know is the funniest sound in the English language. If I were to ask you what a winklepicker is, there's simply no telling what your response might be. There is something slightly naughty about those four syllables that almost inevitably lead one to think it might be slang for something sexy. And, of course, since it contains the word "picker" one might well suppose that it refers to some sort of archaic, old-fashioned job. But then, if that's the case, what is this winkle that requires a picker?

For a brief period of time, about fifteen to thirty minutes, I seriously considered plunking down 200 dollars to buy myself a winklepicker. Now that you know a winklepicker is an object that can be purchased, that should constrain your imagination somewhat. You know also know how much a winklepicker might be worth. Of course, just knowing it can be had for $200 really doesn't help. $200 for beer stein glass might seem excessive, whereas $200 for an armoire is a really good deal. Still, I did mention that I only briefly considered purchasing a Winklepicker for that price, so the implicit assumption you probably made is that I consider $200 to be expensive.

You have to keep in mind that the specific Winkelpicker I was considering that would cost me $200 is only available in England, includes a shipping cost and, most importantly, is part of a limited edition of just 200 pairs. The average cost of a Winklepicker on the web site where I found the ones I want is about $120 before shipping. You'll notice I just said the limited edition was 200 "pairs" and I also used the word "ones" to describe the Winklepickers I had my eye on. So now you know that a Winklepicker is an object that comes in pairs and that $200 is a price I would consider to be too high. On the other hand, were I a millionaire, I would probably have no problem at all in buying every pair of Winklepickers I saw on the web site that sells them. Hmm, what could these mysterious objects be? What comes in pairs? Earrings? Alas, I don't consider sticking a needle into my earlobe and wearing jewelry to be an adequate means of self-expression. Let's face it, in today's society a man wearing an earring is an object of conformity, not rebellion. No, to figure out what a Winklepicker is, you must travel down the body.

Okay, I won't hold you in suspense any longer. As you may know from reading my article on my vain search for the perfect shoe, I prefer pointy-toed footwear. The pointy toe at the end of a shoe is almost impossible to find in mainstream stores anymore. In order to find the kind of shoe I prefer, I typically must frequent either thrift or vintage clothing stores or hit the internet. One day recently, I just happened to come upon a fantastic British fashion site called Underground England. And it was there that I learned about Winklepickers. Turns out I've been wearing Winklepickers for years. I just never knew that was what they were called.

Winklepicker is the name bestowed upon the type of shoe-or boot-that was fashionable footwear for both genders during the rise of rock and roll in the 1950s and 1960s. Winklepickers are distinguished by the length of the shoe that comes to a sharp point. The origin of the odd name is less than clear; one story has it that the name has something to do with using something with a sharp point to dig the edible portion of the periwinkle mollusk from its shell, while another more likely candidate has to do with the fact that many young wearers found their sharp points handy in kicking an opponent in the crotch, winkle being yet another slang term for penis. This latter story makes much more sense when you consider that the Winklepicker was standard footwear for Teddy Boys during the era when violence was a natural part of life between Teddy Boy and Mod gangs.

Anyone who ever bought an album by The Specials or practically any other ska bad has seen Winklepicker shoes. Underground England has some Winklepickers that are tailor made for dancing to ska, in fact. Those checkerboard ones on the site are my second choice after the alphabet shoes. Being a lover of these kinds of shoes as well as a writer, I simply can't imagine a more appropriate pair of shoes for me. I just couldn't look at myself in the mirror if I were to spend that kind of money on shoes, however. (And I have trouble enough looking at my reflection as it is!) Perhaps, one day, I'll find them on sale at eBay for significantly less. Until that day, I will have to live without my dream Winklepickers.