What to Do when You're Bored and Lazy

One can be bored, and one can be bored. The difference? In the first case, you're just unnocupied, looking for something exciting and gratifying to do. The solutions are various, and you just have to google this topic to find a range of activities, ranging from 'working out' to 'cleaning your house', that are bound to keep you busy. In the second case however, you are bored, but it's another sentiment that's ruling your body, and that's laziness. It's nothing personal, but I couldn't possibly imagine myself doing a hundred push-ups in the next five minutes, or classifying all my DVDs by name and colour. The reason is that these would imply I'd have to get up, walk up to my DVD stall, and write down the names of each of my movies, and their colour, and then I'd have to be sure I have the right CD in the right box and, well, that would quite literally kill me.

So what do you do when you're bored and lazy? I made a small list for all you stuck-at-home-with-nothing-else-to-do-but-stare-at-the-monitor-all-day fools like me.

1. Make a list: It sure is fun, and you don't even have to get up, because you may just as well write it on your computer, or just picture it in your mind. If you choose option number 1, you may publish it on the internet somewhere and then spend the rest of the day checking how many people have read your list, and/or read it again for a laugh.

2. Draw something: Either on paper, or by using paint, or another terribly addictive software. The cool thing to do here is to erase your drawing when it's done and try to re-create it using the unlimited power of your superhuman mind. Who knows? You may just as well draw something even better, and then you can brag about it to your friends. Remember that you can also scan and publish this drawing on the internet and check pageviews until you're satisfied.

3. Harass people on Facebook: Using a chronometer, measure the amount of time it takes for these people to block you, and then laugh.

4. Make a movie: Use your webcam, or mobile phone, or brain, to film something. Fun ideas include re-creating "The Godfather" in under five minutes, alien invasions, evil body parts, etc. If you have acne, remember that (gross) videos of people (brutally) popping 'em are extremely popular on youtube. This -could- be your opportunity to become the next internet sensation!

5. Make up a prank: Use your imagination (or google) to create the most diabolical prank ever conceived in the history of mankind. Remember that it should -all- happen between where you are right now and a few feet away. In case you are unable to find a perfect victim, try it on yourself and post it on youtube. Evidently, remember to check your ratings and video views.

Note: If none of these highly ingenious ideas work, you are officially doomed.