What's Under My Bed?

What's under my bed? Oh, dear! Where to even begin... I got the wild idea to clean my room from top to bottom the other night. It's not like it is terribly dirty, just cluttered and dusty. I grabbed what I always grab for this kind of job: a Hazmat suit and a tool belt filled with cans of Lysol. Just kidding about the Lysol.

I normally collect everything into a pile in the middle of the room and sort things out. Laundry goes into the hamper, random papers and books get put away, and the cat helps by pouncing on everything that moves or I try to pick up.

After all of that is sorted out returned to its proper place, I vacuum and dust. I hardly ever make my bed because the cats again love to help. They lie on the sheets while I put the comforter on so there is a moving lump under the covers. When they slither around I have the Jaws theme song playing in my head... dundun dundun dundun dundun duhdun.

My female cat weaseled her way from the top of the bed and went under it. This reminded me that I couldn't remember the last time I had cleaned under there so; I grabbed a broom and used the handle to "sweep" the miscellaneous items from beneath the bed.

Clothes, a book, a whole colony of dust bunnies (complete with a King and Queen Bunny), my missing pillow, various bottles of lotions and perfumes, a science experiment of astronomical proportions, and the cat were strewn all about the room.

I just sat there on my bed and watched the experiment crawl across the floor while the cat poked at it with her front paws. It is fuzzy, green and crawls along on the floor. It is about the size of a softball. I honestly have no idea what that thing is. All I know is that I keep it in a cage in the spare bedroom, and my husband takes it for a walk every night. I have named it Bob for the time being. If it starts spawning it will be named Boberella.

The only way I can guess that Bob was surviving under the bed was by eating the dust bunnies. I don't think he/she/it has a mouth but rather eats things kind of like a starfish. You know, regurgitates its own stomach onto the bunny and then sucks it back in to digest it. I am thinking of keeping Bob instead of sending him to a University for research. Bob is very low maintenance and cheap to feed. He keeps my cats company and I don't have to vacuum or sweep any more.