When a Family Member Goes to War

When a family member or close friend goes to war, it can be very hard to cope. Deployment does not only affect the military official, it affects those of us left at home as well. Often times knowing that what your family or friend is doing for our country is simply not enough. The lingering thoughts of the dangers of war and the living conditions they are suffering through are hard to dismiss. How can you find peace in knowing that your loved one is in another country at war? Deployment is a scary and unfortunately a real occurence that many families face. Read on for some suggestions on how to cope with your emotional feelings during this daunting time.

*Thinking of the memories you share with your loved one will usually help. Display pictures, awards, trophys or medals of honor that they have received. You may choose to keep a journal of your lifestyle while your family or friend has been deployed. Create a scrapbook of events and your feelings that you can share with them when they return.

*If possible, write letters frequently. When you find yourself feeling down, read back over the letters. Often times when someone is close to us we are able to "hear" the words that are being said in a letter. Try to find peace in what your loved one is saying. Send pictures to your family or friend as often as you can. If the family member of friend has children at home, encourage them to write letters and send pictures as well. If allowed, send care packages to your loved one. Often times, receiving a familiar item from home is one of the best things that a soldier can receive. A favorite candy or perhaps some extra stationary to keep in touch with.

*Sometimes communication is not possible. If this is the case it is completely normal to worry, but you should try not to. You might feel scared, worried or even angry that you have not heard from your family member or friend. Quite often we turn to the television newscasts, radio or internet to fill us in on the latest news from war. To be honest, this can make lack of communication worse. More often than not, the media presents us with the worst case scenario and tells of all the problems with the war. Call another friend or family member to ask if they have heard from your loved one.

*If your spouse has been deployed and you have children at home it can become quite stressful. Raising children as a single parent presents its own struggles. Surely, your children will ask about their mother/father and it will be your responsibility to be strong and answer their questions as best you can to eliminate any fears they have. Children hear and see alot of negativity about the war and are often traumatized from the effects.

*Support groups for people with deployed family or friends are very beneficial to most. Going through the deployment process can be a challenging task to do and knowing that there are other people who are experiencing the same feelings as you can help greatly. If there are no support groups in your area, start one. There are sure to be many others that would love to join you.