When a Friend Annoys You

To solve any problem related to your friendship, work out what's troubling you and then have a frank chat with your friend - with empathy and examples.

Head-butters Anonymous
Your friend's behavior is frustrating you, and he/she has no idea that it's negatively impacting your friendship. Often, people tend to remain unaware of their own gaffes. Don't sit down quietly with the problem and hope it just blows over. Hints won't work. Explain to your friend how his/her behavior is making you feel and how it's affecting you on a personal level.

Calm waters run deep
Even though you may be having some sort of 'intervention' with your friend, don't go ballistic or start pointing fingers. Stay patient and explain your point of view with all the necessary air of calm. Begin your conversation on a positive note - like what you love about him/her, how he/she helped you through a break-up or a crisis or what a great time you'll have together on Saturday nights. Of course, at that very point of time, you may be angry because your friend's ill-behavior is fresh in your memory and the thought frankly rankles - but remember why, firstly, you'll are friends.

Pride and prejudice
Have a non-confrontational two-way conversation. Make your stance clear while simultaneously letting him/her know that you're always there for them. Steer clear of saying things like, "You must be feeling so bad!" They'll just feel worse. Look for the positive aspects and be honest and loyal. At the same time though, learn how to say no. If you keep doing what others want, you'll get resentful.

Know what you want
Your friend is the one who talks continuously; you can barely get even half a word in. Well, speak out. Point this out, for the sake of your friendship. Be assertive. Stop their monologue - not by saying "You talk too much", but rather "Hey! I want to say something here". It's human nature - strong-headed people tend to respect those who stand up to them and belittle those who endure their behavior.

Scale the odds
Things may or may not change between the two of you, and you have to decide how you want your friendship to develop and which direction you want it to go in. Often, with time, some friendships grow apart. You may have changed, evolved or matured over the last five years - but don't expect your friend to have done the same. You and your friend can sit together and iron out your differences amicably - just be straightforward, mindful and sensitive. Your friendship can thrive if the two of you can talk it out. However, if you'll just cannot work out your differences, it may be sensible to call it a day.