When a Friend is Not Your Friend

One way to tell whether you have a friend or foe is how that person treats you. It is okay to laugh and joke around as long as it is a mutual amusement. A mutual amusement is when you both find the occurrence funny. However, when you find yourself being the butt of jokes more than usual, and everything about you is amusing look out. A real friend cares about you, and knows who you are as a person. A real friend will accept you without selling your story to the public for a good laugh. Meaning, if you have a secret that is meant for that person it should not be used as a joke for an audience. When a person behaves that way, there is no regard for your feelings as a human being. Therefore, that person should not be thought of an a friend. You are just an amusement to them, and nothing more than that.

Things like this can happen at any age, but you should not let it go. Let your feelings be known, so it won't happen again. Continual disregard for your feelings is an obvious indication that the person does not care. Some jokes may get out of hand now and then, but it can't just happen to you. If the person feels offended, and has a conniption with the joke is turned there is double standards between you. True friends know their limitations, and the person well enough to know what he or she can stand. People like this can be amused for a while, and to prove their disloyalty move on to other friends. You have a right to be around someone who will respect you, and not be friendly just for a laugh.

Perhaps, you maybe a person who likes to be comical and expects to be treated that way. However, you may have a sense of humor with some things more than others. In fact, I don't know a living soul who enjoys being embarrassed. A person you consider your friend should not take joy in your embarrassment, or belittlement. You become a joke if you are made out to be one especially by someone who knows you. No one will take you seriously or even want to work with you if you have the reputation of a fool. This can reign over you like a shadow with whatever you try to do. It could also prevent you from trying anything. Moreover, if your serious personal business is made out to be a joke it can break your confidence down. Some people start to question themselves as if the others could be right. Do not give in to it, but examine yourself. You are the only one who knows yourself very well besides God, and people who are close to you. Be glad that no matter how much of a joke people may think you are, at least you are not mean. In school there was a girl who after awhile told her friends she had a crush on this guy. The problem was that the guy was white, and the girl with the crush was black. Those kids had a ball on that girl telling any other white person that she liked him.

The joke was suppose to embarrass her, and taunt him enough to be rude to her just to teach her a lesson. I saw from a distance that there was anger in their eyes as they laughed. It began with urging her to tell the boy, and when she refused they did. Some of the boys just ignored it while others took the bate and insulted her. Later one of those same people dated a person from another race who happened to be black. An Italian guy heard that a Italian girl liked him, and he shot spit balls at her. A black girl was ribbed on and cursed at by a boy she liked. A Sicilian girl had a crush on a black guy who happened to be a militant guy who told her off, and hurt her feelings. Another girl was taunted by the friends of the guy she liked. Many guys are put down by rude girls they liked. The funny thing about these stories is that people without a clear notion of the issue states how simple it is to tell a person you are interested.

The words of wisdom are " it's only a rejection. It's a Yes or No. How bad can that be?". When it is put in a simple manner between civilized people it isn't so bad. However, when it comes to those bad memories swimming around the head, it is unfathomable to subject ourself to destructive insults. It tears down your self esteem, keeps you out of the dating scene, effects your employment status, turns you into a hermit or shy recluse. Some people may say there is medicine for that. It is true, but there is no medicine for the world around you. People who keep to themselves are not always depressed or full of anxiety. None of us want to be around people who are just plain rude. It is inevitable that we will all meet unpleasant people, and have to learn to deal with them. However, you don't have to stay there on your free time for a bunch of insults. Therefore, it doesn't matter how medicated you are, it will not change the attitudes people have toward you . You will just be a contented medicated person sitting alone. Get used to it without the expensive medication. Better yet, entertain yourself with people who DO enjoy your company. If you can't trust the person with your secrets then the person should not be trusted at all.