When Nightmares Get the Best of Our Children

If you have small children, you have probably been awakened in the middle of the night by nightmare induced cries.

The best way to start is to understand what a nightmare is and what causes it.

Nightmares are a normal way of dealing with everyday life for both children and adults. However, we must take into consideration that children are growing and they are constantly learning something new. Younger children are still developing their own anxieties about the world around them, and trying to learn how to cope with problems and stresses in the lives. These fears and apprehensions are often time associated with sleep disorders and bad dreams.

There are many ways that you can help eliminate the possibility of your children having nightmares, but try to bear in mind that you could do everything in your power and your child could still have bad dreams! One thing that will help your child is to have free communication with them. Discuss any major changes that have occurred or are coming up in your child's life. You would be amazed at how much of a difference having these little talks with your child will help. Getting down to the core of what is bothering your child will help you ease their anxiety before it has an opportunity to develop into something more serious. By talking with your child, you will get a first-hand glimpse into what is important in your child's eyes.

When your child has had a nightmare, the best thing that you can offer up is your warmth and calming support. Comfort your child gently. Many parents get angered by the fact that their sleep has been interrupted, and give little thought to the needs of their children. Being a patient and comforting source of care for your children will help them recover from their frightening dream much faster than just telling them to go back to sleep. Take a moment to talk to your child and ask them what it was they were dreaming about, if they can remember. Reassure your child that their dreams cannot hurt them, and that they are safe at home and that you are there. If it helps, stay with your child until he or she falls back to sleep. In the morning, discuss the occurrence and see if you can break any new ground with the situation. Help your child understand the process of dreaming and reassure them that everyone has bad dreams at some point. Perhaps sharing one of your milder nightmares will help them feel like they are truly not alone.

A major way to cut down on bad dreams is to evaluate your child's activities. Is your child exercising enough? Some tests have shown that lack of physical activity can actually lead to mental strain on small children. Is your child under much stress? Factors such as divorce, hard time at school or problems making friends can all contribute to the stress that leads to nightmares. Even the consumption of certain foods or vegetables may be causing your child to lose previous restful sleep. Many doctors suggest that you monitor your child's snacking and cut it off several hours before bedtime, and make sure that your child is eating healthy meals. Minimizing the time your child has to watch television each night will also drastically help your situation, as it has been proven that excessive television watching causes overstimulation in younger children. Too much t.v. can keep your child from resting peacefully at night as well as keep their little brains wide awake and open for dreams or nightmares. If your child reads stories or watches material on television that you think could be causing their bad dreams, do not let them engage in those activities in the hours prior to going to bed, or eliminate them altogether.

Sometimes the best preparation can come right before going to sleep. I have spoken with many parents who have ingeniously come up with some unique and effective methods to keeping their children confident in warding off the bad dreams that torment them. One parent swears by their "Anti-Bad Dream Spray". Sounds pretty high-tech doesn't it! All it is is a simple home fragrance spray with a homemade label on it. It has a picture of a silly monster on it and it says "Anti-Bad Dream Spray" on the label. She and her child give his room a little spritz right before turning out the lights and her son is able to fall right to sleep. If a bad dream occurs, her son sprays another spritz into the room and tries to go back to sleep. She says that they have had a record decrease in nightmares since they first began this fun ritual. Another parent I know has a sweet dreams song that he and his daughter sing everynight when he tucks her in. They sing about flowers laughing and cloud jumping in their dreams. One other parent sits down with her daughter each night after their bedtime story and they "plan" out her daughter's dreamy nocturnal adventures. She allows her daughter to make up silly stories about what she will do in her dreams each night. She says this keeps her daughter focused on happy things as she falls asleep.

Leaving a nightlight on for your child is always a winner, and even leaving their bedroom doors open or ajar can help them out a lot. Sometimes children can feel trapped or isolated if their doors are closed. They fear that if they are to cry out or find themselves in trouble that no one will be able to hear them.
As you can see, as a parent you have incredible power over helping your child. You can come up with a silly game, a funny song or even a homemade Anti-Mr. Boogey spray if you think it will empower your children. Bad dreams are no fun, but they are a part of life. The only thing that we can do is to share our love and comfort with our children and help them cope with them as best we can.