When Should You Start Teaching Children About Sex?

America is hung up on sex. Either we attempt to avoid discussions about it or we overindulge. The biggest argument I have heard about sex is when should we begin teaching our children about it. There are still many parents so uncomfortable with the idea of talking to their children that they elect to either ignore the topic or abdicate the whole subject to someone other than themselves.

When should a parent begin teaching their children about sex? Some would argue when you potty train your child you have the perfect opportunity to start teaching. No, you won't start telling your child about sexual acts between two people but you do need to teach them about their own body.

It is actually quite simple to teach your children about sex without that overwhelming embarrassment over the "birds and bees" conversation all at once. That type of conversation is normally a waste of time, anyway. Most kids have a pretty good idea of what sex is by the time they are ten, sometimes even younger. With puberty starting earlier with every few generations, it is important that parents start teaching their child early by supplying them with the correct information instead of what they hear from other children. When a parent gives their child correct and accurate information, your child is better prepared to make good decisions and not end up becoming a parent before they (or you) are ready.

When you start teaching your child how to use a potty chair instead of diapers, a child will be naturally curious about body parts and bodily functions. It is not difficult to explain to a child how to use the potty chair and how they are being a "big boy/girl". If that is simple to do, it should not be difficult to gradually teach them about their body. Over time you will empower your child with knowledge...this is my body and I know what is going on.

Too many children learn about sex and their body from peers and/or experimentation. You could change those odds by giving your children the information before their curiosity gets out of hand and allow them to be curious about other things. Waiting until your son or daughter hits puberty head on is not a good idea.

OH MY GOSH! Did she just say you should start teaching kids about their body when they begin learning how to use a toilet? YES.

Do small children need to be taught? That's a no-brainer...YES. The reasons why are many but the best reason I can think of is so that your child will learn early how to know if someone is getting to amorous with them. Would your child know that they can be touched in a way that is wrong? Would they know what to do if they were touched in an inappropriate manner? If a parent teaches their children about their body at an early age, their children will be able to identify inappropriate situations and find safety with other adults. A child is more apt to inform you of something wrong if they know what is happening. Many times a child will be threatened by someone who could abuse them but if you teach your child that the reason a threat may be made is to frighten them into silence, that child will be less likely to keep something from you.

A decent example would be something like this;

Someone tries to touch a child in a way that they should not. This person does not want to go to jail so they tell the child that they will hurt someone else if the child tells anyone. If this child has been taught about their body and also warned about a threat being just to scare them, this child would be more likely to tell you what happened. A child that has not been taught would most likely believe the threat, not tell anyone and bottle it up because they would be afraid to talk about it. What is the difference? What would you think if you were told in advance that something could happen and what you could do about it? Odds are that you would do something about it...so would a child if we give them the information to do so.

Small children are sponges. We can give them the tools they need or we can abdicate our authority and responsibility, letting our children take chances with the information they get second and third hand. If a parent takes charge to give their children the correct information, simply teaching them about their bodies, they won't have to sweat it over having that big, uncomfortable conversation that everyone wants to avoid.

A child that understands where babies come from is less likely to want one of their own too soon. I have known too many teenage mothers and even an 11 year old mother who were never told where babies come from. Babies were always seen as a bundle of unconditional love that you could walk away from when you got bored. On the other hand, young ladies I have known who were taught about their bodies and where babies come from were less likely to get pregnant before graduating high school or even college.

Your child can know everything possible about their own bodies and where babies come from by the age of six (6). If so, you have taught your children almost all they need to know about sex. While teaching them about their body you could throw in something about things that can make you sick...STDs. The information can be broken down to language that is age appropriate but there is no reason you can not teach your child about these things at a young age. Discussions about sex will come up over the growth span of your child but they will be much easier to handle if you start teaching early.

Starting your children off in this manner will also add to the trust between you and them. Your child will be more likely to talk to you about personal things instead of shutting you out.

Your views on abstinence can be infused as you see fit but remember...telling a child that they are not allowed to do something is like daring them to do it. If you give your child accurate information you can give them a CHOICE. The information you teach them coupled with your values/ethics that you teach will allow a child to grow up knowing what could happen and what they would rather do instead. Choices ALWAYS work better than demands and/or ultimatums

I have known too many grandparents in their 30s who never took the time to teach their kids about their bodies or where babies come from. You do not have to have a graphic conversation about intercourse...bodies and babies work just fine for starters. We can not expect our children to "just say no" to anything if we do not teach them why they shouldn't do something.