Whirligig: Paul Fleishman's Tale Has Great Plot but Bad Dialogue

Whirligig is the first book I've read in a long time that really disappointed me. It's the story of a Brent Bishop, a teenager whose reckless driving leads to the death of Lea Zamora, a girl who had promises of a bright future.

Lea's mother asks Brent to create whirligigs of Lea and place them in the four corner of the United States. She provides the bus ticket and the tools, and thus begins Brent's journey. It's a great plot, but the unnatural dialogue ruins it from the start. Here is an excerpt from pages 20-21:

"You don't like surprises. You like certainties. Facts. an extremely dangerous side effect of having marine biologists for parents. So let's look at the facts. First, we're eighth-graders. We're in our biological prime. In many cultures around the world we'd already be married and bearing children. Soon our beauty will fade. Very soon. Just look at Sheila Sperl's older sister.

Second, three weeks and six days ago, Trevor and I pledged our love to each other. Third, you remain unattached, as you've been all two and half years of middle school. Fourth, it's the Christmas holidays, a time known to be especially painful for single people like yourself.

Fifth and last, and most important, we've been best friends ever since nursery school. Who else but me has written you a birthday poem for six straight years? And who else besides you shows up at the Great Books discussion group I started? I don't want this to come between us, Steph. we have to find you a boyfriend."

No eighth grader talks like this. Alexandra and Steph(anie) go on to visit one of Brent Bishop's whirligig's, which somehow leads Stephanie to her true love. His whirligigs seem to have a supernatural power, and the book includes narratives from people who encounter them and how they affect their lives. Though Brent does complete his journey and seems to have grown as a person, we never really feel his anguish or his guilt of his crime.

What should be a classic story of redemption becomes awkward through unrealistic dialogue and odd settings - at the party Brent attends in the beginning, a bully moves him like a chess piece before his human chess game. The teenagers in Superbad are much more realistic than these odd characters, and it derives from the overall story. It's disappointing to see such a promising premise go to waste, but in the end, that's what Whirligig is.