White Elephant Gift Ideas

Well it's almost that time of year again. Soon you and your friends will all be getting together for a Christmas party. And of course that means somewhere along the way you'll be invited to a White Elephant party, otherwise known as a Dirty Santa party. The idea of a White Elephant party is bring a present that is a gag gift of sorts. Me being a big fan of gags here are a few suggestions.

Half Off
If you're really mean a great gag gift is to give someone one half of a pair of something. Like give them one shoe or one sock or one glove but don't give them the other one. This was actually my gift one year. A friend of mine gave me one bright red shoe as a gag gift. Of course he made the mistake of thinking I would never wear it. I wore that shoe for the next six years even though I didn't have the other matching shoe.

Sarcastic Ball
You all know about the Magic 8 Ball right? Well for those of you who don't there is a magic eight ball toy you can get and you're supposed to ask it a question, then shake up the ball, and it will give you a yes or no answer. The Sarcastic Ball is the same thing except it gives you sarcastic answers. For example you could ask it "Am I going to marry Carrie Underwood one day?" And its answer would be something like "In Your Dreams!" or "Yeah! And I'm the Pope!"

Batteries
Round up all the batteries you can find in the house, used or new. Make sure there is a good assortment of different sizes; even throw in some tiny watch batteries if you can find them. Put all the batteries in a box or bag and for the finishing touch put a label on it that says "Gifts not included."

Strike a Pose
If you're invited to the party then you must be well liked so this present should definitely be valuable. Take a picture of yourself and blow it up to whatever size you feel is necessary, then autograph it. If you're really as popular as you think you are then everybody will want that sucker. If you have a White Elephant party with the same people every year this could even be a running joke. The next year put the same picture on a t-shirt, the year after that make a mouse pad with the same picture. Or if you really want to go all out make a calendar with a picture of you for each month.

Soda
Soda is always a great gift to give people, but giving them regular soda would be no fun. That's why you should give them unusually strange soda flavors. Jones Soda Co. has some great examples of unusual flavors and I'm not talking about Twisted Lime or Banana berry. I'm talking about candy corn flavored soda or Turkey and Gravy flavored soda.

White Elephant
Well if you like to be a literal smarty pants like me then no present is better than a little stuffed Elephant (or a real one if you can afford it). Then when they open it and see a cute stuffed animal they realize it's not really a gag gift. Then you say "what? I thought we were supposed to bring a white elephant gift." If you and your friends call it Dirty Santa then get a stuffed Santa and roll it around in the dirt. If you live in the North and your friends call it a Yankee swap then I can't help you.

Christmas Music
Christmas music is great isn't it? So joyful and fun, what gift is better than Christmas music? After all it's the only holiday with its own music. Of course I'm not suggesting you give them good Christmas music, just Christmas music. Find some really bad group who had a Christmas album and bring that for your White Elephant gift. For example one year I chose the New Kids On the Block's Christmas album as my white elephant gift. Have a Funky Funky Christmas!