Why All Women Need Midwives

I never knew I needed a midwife. It sounds like something out of Gone With the Wind or something. I didn't know I needed a midwife until I had one. The turning point in my experience as a woman on the planet was witnessing the home birth and midwife delivery of my nephew. Until then, I thought, like I'd been trained to think, that birth should happen in the hospital. Seeing the birth of Makena there at home with friends and loved ones, the midwife masterfully slipping the cord from around his neck, not one, not two, but three times, suctioning his nose and mouth and then coaxing him to breathe, I was forever changed. It was one of the top five experiences of my life. How I wish that birth were something that we all experience. And it would be if more people did it at home. I knew from that moment forward that any children of mine deserved that kind of reverent birth.

I still didn't know I needed a midwife. I didn't know until I found myself on the brink of a miscarriage. I called the only midwife I knew - the one who had delivered my nephew. She talked me through the miscarriage. Wow. She later asked when my last "well woman" exam had been. I told her that it had been in college. She said I really should come in for one. I called her, and set up the appointment. What I experienced at my exam was totally unexpected.

I loved it. I loved my gynecological exam. She spent a whole hour with me, something that a doctor had never done. There was no exam table, no stirrups. It was so natural and normal. You're on a bed - the same bed in her birthing center that women can choose as a venue for giving birth if home won't do. She just has you slide to the edge of the bed, put the soles of your feet together and she then kneels on the floor to complete the exam. She asked me when my last eye exam was. She made sure that I floss my teeth because they've found a link between the bacteria that thrive beneath the gumline and eventual heart disease. She asked me how much I exercise and what my diet is like. She told me to do Kegel exercises daily so that not only will I have rockin' good sex, but I'll actually have bladder control as an old woman. She asked how my emotional life was. In a nutshell, I felt like I had really just had a well woman exam, from one woman to another. And this woman really cared about my health.

When I needed an ultrasound due to Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, I trusted the gynecologist that she sent me to, just because she thought he was good.

She's the one who taught me how to breast feed my newborn. She basically shoved way more of my nipple in his mouth than I thought possible, and voila, he was a champion piglet. She taught me how to not get mastitis, or a breast infection, by nursing in all different positions which ensures the emptying of all of the milk ducts. She told me something so important to not give up on breast feeding in those first few days: that my baby was on a mission from God to bring in my milk, and that it could take a few days. I stuck with it and nursed whenever he cried. To this day, 20 months later, I've still got milk if he needs it.

She's the one who told me to make sure to stay in bed for two to four weeks after the birth of my child so that I don't need a hysterectomy in my 50's.

She's the one who taught me about Sambucol, a nautral antiviral.

She taught me how to snort salt water when I think I'm getting a sinus infection.

And on top of all the things she's raised my awareness about, she made my pregnancy and birth so easy, so predictable, so normal, so magical, so mine.

Thank you, Marimikel Penn and Debra Day, her assistant. There's nothing like having true wise women around when you need them.

If you don't have a midwife, you should. You're life will change. For the better.