Why I Cannot Stand 24 Hour News People...Let Me Count the Ways

1. How about you show actual HARD NEWS, all the time? You may lose ratings, but those people that stay will actually receive an education.

What makes me really, really angry about this is that the news stations inquire why the general public thinks the way it does and then covers maybe five hours of substance and 19 hours of trash. Of course with that imbalance, the trash thinkers will far outweigh the bright. Talk about more politics other than the election; what's going on in the House, what is the Senate doing, give a breakdown on our agricultural industry, what lobbyist group is running things and why? These are the things the American people should know!

2. Stop with the celebrity garbage. If I wanted to know what was going on with the life of Britney Spears, I have bigger problems.

News is not suppose to be the American escape from reality; last time I checked, that was either books, or American Idol. Just kidding, what American reads?

3. If you're not supposed to have an opinion, then don't shout it at us. One, it annoying. And two, televisions are so good now there is something called "volume," we can control how loud or soft we would like the coverage to be. I know it's wild right?

The more you scream or continuously ask questions that add little to no value to the conversation, the less I care.

4. Wolf Blitzer, shave your beard.

It's only the professional thing to do. It's getting kind of wild; or is that the point...Wolf?

5. Lou Dobbs, why do you hate foreigners? And facts?

Sometimes I wonder if Dobbs even reads the bills and acts he screams about. I read them, and I'm able to answer the majority of the questions you ask. And so for foreigners, Lou, were you robbed by a Mexican? All of this hatred has to come from somewhere. Or perhaps they placed your child's apple picking company out of business? American labor is pretty expensive.

6. FOX News isn't supposed to be funny, right?

Oh right, fair and balanced? That phrase deserves a little more context. Fair in the sense that it will always be conservative-biased, always criticize minorities, and will never stop condemning the Clintons to an eternal hellfire. Balanced in the sense that it will do that half the time; the other half FOX will lie and tell the world that it would never do such a thing. Brilliance in incompetency.

7. What happened to investigative reporting?

Okay, I don't need to see a reporter flying across the street in 75mph winds and a deluge of rain to know there's a hurricane. I believe I would know that it was a hurricane by the 75mph winds and a deluge of rain. However, I would like to know why the entire Justice Department, which is and has been corrupt for the past eight years, has not been in the news at all. And what the status of the hearings are. And what is to become of the previous Attorney General.

8. Only beautiful ladies?

I am not complaining. I enjoy getting my pseudo-news from gorgeous women. But, if we are to show the example of equality, apparently CNN should be hiring some Chippendale weather anchors, bodybuilding sports reporters, and chiseled-chin men reporting business. I'm just looking out for the ladies.

9. Why so angry?

Jack Cafferty needs a hug.

10. Until we get a public, serious, news system like BBC, none of this will change.

No offense C-SPAN. Ah the glory of private enterprise. Don't you love it when it kicks you in the back of the head?