Why Did 'Stand by Your Man' Maria Shriver Finally Walk Away?

Some Theories on Why Maria Shriver May Want to Terminate Her Marriage to Arnold Schwarzenegger

Nancy Tracy
COMMENTARY | First John and Elizabeth Edwards, then Al and Tipper Gore. Now Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver? The former Governator and his Kennedy clan wife are the latest political power couple to unravel after a long-term marriage that seemed as strong as the movie star's massive muscles.

It took runaway bride Shriver 25 years of marriage to her Horatio Alger husband before she finally decided to separate from him. During his first campaign for governor of California in 2004, Schwarzenegger was dogged by accusations of inappropriate fondling and groping of various women, yet Shriver stood by her man. At the time, she told Vanity Fair,

"You have to know your own truth. You have to know the person in front of you. You have to be able to separate what your reality is, what other people's perceptions are . . . . It is your life, your marriage, your experience." Though hardly a denial that her husband was unfaithful, Shriver shrewdly added, "After all these years we are still engaged with each other, hot for each other, into each other," implying that her relationship to Schwarzenegger was solid.

So what happened to finally cause the fall of the house of Schwarzenegger-Shriver?

Arnold Was Back

The famous Schwarzenegger line "I'll be back" became reality when Arnold's term as governor ended. During his eight-year reign as California's head honcho, Schwarzenegger jetted back and forth to the couple's mansion in Brentwood, but he spent many nights in Sacramento, the state capital. Despite Schwarzenegger's hectic travel schedule since leaving the statehouse, it is possible the prospect of having a full-time husband back in the house was too hard to handle.

Parents Are Gone

A friend of Shriver told the Los Angeles Times that Shriver had considered separating from Schwarzenegger back in 2009 after her mother, Eunice Kennedy Shriver, died. But the death of her father, Sargent Shriver, in January could have sealed the deal.

Maria may have discovered Arnold could not fill the void left by her parents, with whom she was reportedly close. A staunch Catholic, she may also have been reluctant to seek a divorce -- frowned upon by the Catholic church -- while her parents were still alive.

Children Are Older

Shriver may have wanted to wait until children Katherine, Christina, Patrick and Christopher were old enough to deal with a house divided. Although divorce is as common in Hollywood as designer handbags, it can still be emotionally devastating for children. The couple's two daughters are now adults, and sons Patrick and Christopher will turn 18 and 14, respectively, this fall.

Tired of Being "The Good Wife"

As with the character Alicia Florick of the CBS TV show "The Good Wife," Shriver had to play the role of perfect political wife despite problems percolating in her personal life. Even Shriver's friend admitted to the Los Angeles Times that what the cameras saw was an act. "Everyone who's shocked by this is reacting to the fairy-tale picture that was promoted," she said. Whether or not Schwarzenegger had an affair or even several affairs in recent years, chances are good that rumors flared up regularly, and Shriver may have grown weary of being the suspicious spouse.

Mid-Life Crisis

Shriver has talked a lot about transformations lately. Her official website includes videos featuring life coach Martha Beck on "Why It's Important to Relax During a Transition" and political wife and daughter Cindy and Meghan McCain on "Reinvention." It is possible Shriver is ready to metamorphose into a new place in life that does not have room for an ego-maniacal movie star.

Ironically, Hillary Clinton remains one of the few political wives who is still standing by her man despite putting up with a player and claiming on "60 Minutes" she was not "some little woman 'standing by my man' like Tammy Wynette" after husband Bill Clinton was besieged by bimbo eruptions during his first campaign for president. Maybe it has something to do with the fact the former first lady is usually halfway across the globe in her new role as secretary of State.

Published by Nancy Tracy - Featured Contributor in Arts & Entertainment

Nancy Tracy is a Yahoo! Featured Contributor for arts & entertainment. She enjoys writing about a variety of topics from psychology to politics to popular culture. Her article on "Transient Global Amnesia" w...  View profile

13 Comments

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  • Jeanne Baney6/6/2011

    It just becomes embarrassing after awhile! I say well riddance!

  • Tracie Walker5/26/2011

    Sad. Just... sad.

  • Michael Segers5/21/2011

    Slightly off topic, but she looks like she needs to eat more. She seems to be bordering on anorexia.

  • Thomas Lane5/20/2011

    Wives of powerful men have come to expect infidelity, but very few of them will put up with public humiliation.

  • Patricia Sicilia5/19/2011

    I never liked Arnold and never understood why Maria married him. I also don't understand how she couldn't have known about the kid. All reports by those who know him say the kid is Arnold's spitting image. Even the blurred photos I've seen on the 'net seem to confirm this.

  • Lori Gunn5/19/2011

    excellent work:) Thanks for sharing.

  • L. R. Laverde-Hansen5/17/2011

    Well--now we know the straw which broke the camel's back!

  • Mike Oberg5/16/2011

    It's hard to stay married when one or both partners are traveling a lot -- as they say, absence makes the heart fonder...for someone else! And for those who have positions of fame or power -- the temptations are too great for most. And that is why I won't be running for President! :)

  • Mary Oberg5/16/2011

    Always sad when a long term marriage fails!

  • Claire Luna-Pinsker5/16/2011

    I believe she's been putting on a supportive front for a long time, don't believe she's a woman who'll accept his playing around. Once his term was over she made the decsion to take her dignity back. Arnold's a great actor but he also has that roving women eye. Bravo to her for taking back her life.

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