Why Don't Parents Discipline Their Kids Anymore?
When did our society start allowing our children to misbehave so horribly? Personally, I think it was around the time when the "experts" started saying spanking a child was "abuse". I am a firm believer in spanking a child when it is necessary. I have two sons and yes, they were spanked from time to time. They are now 19 and 17 and both of them are well adjusted young men. Getting a spanking once in a while, did not harm them in any way, shape, or form.
My boys were not angels by any means. But they did know how to act in public. They knew that running through a store like a wild animal was not acceptable. When my youngest son was 4, we were in the store. A little girl asked her mother if she could have a doll. The mother said no and the little girl proceeded to throw the doll on the floor, threw herself on the floor, and had a tantrum. Kicking, screaming, the whole nine yards.
My son watched this for a minute then asked "Mommy, what would you do if I did that?" I said, "What do you think I'd do?" He said, "I think you'd spank my butt." The woman looks at my son and in a very snobby voice says, "I do not spank my child!" My son looked at the little girl, looks up at the mother, and before I could stop him, says, "You should."
As I said, my boys are no angels. The way they acted in public was a lot different than how they acted at home. They would fight with each other constantly. If a quick swat on the behind didn't work, I had other punishments that were effective. (Like making them sit with their arms around each other.) And as they got older, grounding worked wonders.
Discipline does not mean just spanking. And if time outs, naughty chairs, etc. work for a child, then by all means, do it. But do something. Don't allow your kids to run around a store like they're at the playground. Take control of your kid's behavior, because at the end of the day, their behavior is a direct reflection on you.
Published by Judy Kramer
A mother of 2, grandmother of 2. Writer. View profile
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31 Comments
Post a CommentGod bless America, where we can have these conversations :) However useless they may be :)
you people who think that spanking their kids is abuse need to be locked up!! your the ones with the idiot children running through a department store, and people stopping and staring and pointing. Because of you people, our society is shambles, you need to wake up and discipline your kids, because if you dont, you end up with a bunch of self entitled little punks running around. I wish i could slap you!!!!
Iand even less when my parents growing up. Obviously the form of discipline our ancestor's used must have done something right. There is nothing traumatizing by a good swat on the butt to get a child's attention when words do nothing.
I think everyone has their own opinion regarding the reprimanding their children for their wrong doing however I do not think one should automatically presume that a child that is spanked is being abused cause in a lot of cases it is not so. When there are no bruises left or welps left then it is not by any stretch of the imagination abuse. My parents and teachers spanked me when it was necessary and I did not feel emotionally traumatized by it but learned what was right or wrong and became a better person for it. In today's society if a child mis-behaves they want to put them on medication that I have been told by those that take it makes them feel like a zombie but I guess that isn't abuse to dope up a kid rather then dealing with the root of the behavior problems. Oddly enough for those that say that kids that are spanked turn violent I find that statement very odd since you very rarely heard of kids shooting their classmates or other violent crimes when I was growing up and even le
Sorry there are so many errors, I didn't proof read!
I agree, I used to work in a store as well and, and I seen a mother who was all concerned with picking our jewelry while the kids ran all through the department, I was so upset because the little girl fell, and it was close to glass, and I could see the mother crying a lawsuit, but the girl wasn't hurt, it's all about tact, and I refuse to let my daughter act crazy in a store.
I definatly agree that doing something is better than doing nothing!
I appreciate the comments I've gotten so far. I don't necessarily agree with everyone, obviously, but I do appreciate reading all the different POV's.
All of the studies done show that children who are spanked are more likely to be violent and have more behavioral problems later on. Spanking hurts. It doesn't teach a lesson. It's what you say to your child that teaches the lesson, and there are better ways to get a child's attention. I agree that spanking is abuse. Every kid misbehaves sometimes. They forget; they are impulsive; they are children. They don't need to be beaten into submission or struck to get the point across. I know from experience that sometimes it seems like the only option or a good choice, but it's not. Spanking is hitting. You wouldn't hit your wife for doing something you don't think is right or intelligent. Why is it ok to do it to children? Why is it that I can't hit my neighbor if she breaks my door down to teach her a lesson, but if a child were to deliberately kick it in, it would be ok for his parents to hit him to teach him 'better'? (As if violence can be used to teach peace?)
Ever Odessa - How dare you!! First of all, that is NOTHING like saying molestation isn't actually abuse, because it is, and I don't appreciate such an outlandish remark. I'm aware that a kid doesn't have to be hit with a 2x4 to be considered abuse. There are parents who go overboard- I'm fully aware of that. What I was referring to is a simple "spank on the butt" - that is not abuse, that is spanking. I know the difference and don't appreciate the fact that your sole intention was to insult my intelligence.