Why I Hate America

I'm sick of my country. I'm sick of the arrogance, ignorance, and overindulgence of the American people and I'm sick of the brainwashed Yankee Doodle dimwits who still think it's appropriate to wave the flag of patriotism in the faces of intelligent Americans and utter the jackass phrase: "America: love it or leave it."

Americans need to get over themselves. They need to get off their haughty high horses and take a look at the real world. They need to stop lying to themselves and start waking up to the new millennium, where earth-shaking evolution and exploitation are changing the very rules of survival. It's do-or-die time on the third rock from the sun and the good old Stars and Stripes should be blazing new trails towards the preservation our dying planet rather than fostering its ultimate destruction. In the final decades of truth Americans are playing pre-revolutionary possum in the new age of globalization and shutting their eyes to the historical and sociological fallacies of our outdated myths, traditions, and conventions. It's high time to forget about our foolish fables and folklore and once again embrace the tenants of a true democracy: the freedom to overcome iron-fisted unreasonableness and change the status quo of a sick society for the higher good of the people.

Far too many old fashioned, bread-and-butter Americans are saying, thinking, and doing the wrong things. They're lost in delusional daydreams of deception, stuck in thickheaded thoughts of stubbornness, and they want to blame the realistic and practical human beings of the mother ship, the folks who see the light and know that the only way to survive is by changing with the times, for the biggest problems now facing our nation. Are you an active member of this great American "brainless puppet on a string" society? Are you a self-deceiving ignoramus or a free-thinking realist? To find out, here's my top-ten list on how to become a bona fide, card-carrying member of the American Boneheads-of-the-Century Club.

Use the word liberal in a negative or condescending way.
It's almost comical how so many middle-class Americans seem to forget how our country got started in the first place. A bunch of liberals (actually called rebels and traitors at the time) turned against England's conservative political leaders and started a country of their own. In case you have no idea what the word liberal means, here are the first two definitions at Dictionary.com:

1. Not limited to or by established, traditional, orthodox, or authoritarian attitudes, views, or dogmas; free from bigotry.

2. Favoring proposals for reform, open to new ideas for progress, and tolerant of the ideas and behavior of others; broad-minded.

Just imagine what the original free-thinkers of American society would say to the conservative Neanderthals of today!

Refuse to accept scientific facts about the catastrophic destruction of our planet.
The earth is a planet in a solar system in a galaxy in a universe all made up of at least 117 of the confirmed chemical elements known to man. These facts are irrefutable. Refusing to believe the empirical truth of science is like trying to hold your breath underwater without a mask; no matter how hard you close your eyes you must eventually return to the surface for more air if you ever want to see the world clearly again. Americans need to stop believing dumbass politicians and start heeding the advice of enlightened scientists.

Listen to conservative talk radio.
These celebrated men and women are nothing more than white-bread barnstormers performing prefrontal lobotomies on the brains of die-hard right-wingers with chummy homespun distortions of the truth. They love to prevaricate about such un-American evils as earnest and open-minded discourse and discerning thought and action. They proselytize listeners with innuendos and double-talk designed to stimulate their false and fervent inklings of patriotism while short-circuiting their ability to think judiciously for themselves.

Disparage documentaries that expose the truth about big fat American lies.
Documentary films are one of the mainstays of a true democracy. They give filmmakers the freedom to share the bitter pills of truth and knowledge with the rest of society. In case you don't know what a documentary is, here's the second definition at Dictionary.com:

2. Movies, television based on or re-creating an actual event, era, life story, etc., that purports to be factually accurate and contains no fictional elements.

Just imagine the creative, free-thinking liberals of the American Revolution who might be the top documentary moviemakers of today. The "Committee of Five" who drafted the Declaration of Independence, John Adams, Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Jefferson, Robert R. Livingston, and Roger Sherman, would most likely be in the same celluloid liberal league as Ken Burns, Errol Morris, Alex Gibney, Michael Apted and Michael Moore. These filmmakers are true unsung heroes of America, yet hordes of half-witted hardhats across the country are persecuting these artists for their brave takes on the front-page factual events of the real world. Such conventional cretins need to pull their heads out of the mythical sand and take a bird's-eye view of reality.

Dismiss Ralph Nader as the next-best President.
Ralph Nader is probably 500 years ahead of his time. Run-on-the-mill rednecks have no chance of understanding his message, but far too many sharper, middle-of-the-road Americans are still unable to take him seriously because they've been brainwashed by American propaganda. The black eye in American society to resist positive change for the better is best epitomized by the out-of-date catch phrase, America: love it or leave it. A newer, more proper phrase might be, America: fix it or forget it. Ralph Nader wants Americans to take a capable and imaginative gander at corporate greed and corruption, the blurry but substantial merging of the two-party system, and the clearer but still widening gap between the haves and the have-nots. Corporate America is running the poor, huddled masses of the country into the gutter while throwing the snazziest, most highfalutin party of the century for the wired and wealthy aristocrats of high society. It's almost comical the way so many old-line Americans seem to forget about a much more important quote from one of the greatest men in our checkered history, "...and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth."

Put bad politics before good principles.
It's absolutely true that the densest folks are often the hardest to deal with. Uneducated and unintelligent dunces from all walks of life seem to believe that being Americans gives them the right to act like loud-mouthed nincompoops parroting the fallacious opinions of Middle America as their own. This is the best way to become a puppet on a string. American simpletons have no idea they're puppets because like the lower primates they lack the brain power to distinguish between what is real and what is imagined in the big mirror of existence. They don't know the difference between fact and fiction or truth and fantasy. Bad breeding, poor parenting, and minority oppression aside, the white-trash mentality of the Bible belters and the street-wise defiance of the gangbanging icons of popular culture are turning the land of free, from its wide-open spaces to its urban wastelands, into the home of the brainless.

Shut your eyes to the brilliantly humane idea of universal health care.
How can one of the wealthiest and most industrialized nations in the free world rank number 37 (right behind Costa Rica and just ahead of Slovenia) on the World Health Organization's list of health care systems? The answer: perfidious politics and corporate corruption. American health insurance companies are getting filthy rich in an outrageously greedy system that shuts out nearly 50 million Americans, including children, from getting the proper health care they deserve. Take an honest and impartial look at Michael Moore's "Sicko" to see how utterly twisted the system has become. Remember to watch it with your eyes open and without holding your breath. And, in case you've never heard of the Republic of Slovenia, it's a small country in southern Central Europe bordering four countries and the Adriatic Sea.

Believe that Democrats and Republicans belong to separate political parties.
This is one of Ralph Nader's favorite arguments. It's almost comical how so many fuddy-duddy Americans actually believe they "belong" to a political party that has their best interests at heart. This kind of brainwashing starts early and by the time dyed-in-the-wool democrats and reactionary republicans reach voting age they're so convinced and conditioned by the dogmatic rhetoric of their ridiculous political systems and leaders they have zero tolerance for the views of others. They belong to the one-and-only party that stands for the most important principles that they and the rest of the country must believe in. They're so bamboozled by their own cooked-up convictions they scarcely remember how or why they started believing them in the first place. The politicians who run the republican and democratic parties are one in the same. The vast majority of American statesmen and women in the 21^st century are nothing more than high-reaching, power-loving robber barons disguised as public servants who have neither the time nor the disposition to care about your petty problems and oafish opinions. You are not now, nor will you ever be, a member of the crème-de-la-crème club.

Trust a politician from Texas who stands for everything wrong with America today.
If you voted for, believed in, or followed George Bush, you're an American Bonehead-of-the-Century beyond my words and descriptions.

Roll your eyes at the sad but realistic truth of this article.
America's founding fathers were the kind of men who challenged authority and questioned the status quo. They fought for democracy and founded a country where law-abiding citizens had the freedom to choose what they believed and to pursue their own definitions of happiness. America, and the world, has changed. Political mismanagement is wreaking havoc on a planet riddled with complicated issues and dilemmas and infested with bureaucratic backbiting and profiteering. It's a sad state of affairs. It's almost comical how so many Americans seem to think the best solution is to close their eyes, hold their breath, and think and behave just like the British bluebloods the founding fathers turned against all those years ago. The true mark of a nation ready for revolution lies in the sheer complacency and obstinacy of its most misguided and misinformed blowhards who place high-flown patriotism above all else, including the pursuit of real freedom.