Why Joe Francis Should Go Out with Paris Hilton (Again!) and Where They Should Go

Since Joe Francis has announced his new clothing line called MAGIC what better spokesmodel to showcase his "swimsuits, sweatsuits, sandals and tops" than celeb deb Paris Hilton? After all, she needs some good publicity other than the usual DWI arrest or the typical "Paris Hilton night on the town."

And this pimps-n-ho's clothing line for Mormons and Mennonites would work for Hilton; she's, like, totally used to weird guys and girls with strange fetishes rubbing up on her and asking her to make them more famous.

Though the "Girls Gone Wild" co-founder is usually more interested in having women take off their clothing, as opposed to keeping it on, Francis can be rest assured that Hilton can go from trashy whore to classy debutante in a matter of seconds. This will give his public image a major boost-and propel the flesh peddler into the mainstream.

She's the kind of woman who can drive a Bentley and wheel it through a McDonalds drive-up and make even that look sexy. It's probably got something to do with that pout she likes to give the paparazzi, who will no doubt be inches away from her car, while "Jimbob" the photog dreams of sharing a Chicken McNugget 9-piece combo meal.

That would never happen, since Hilton doesn't eat much meat-but Francis knows how to handle the paparazzi, though he'll have to forgive Hilton for introducing him to the guy who hogtied and handcuffed him to his floor.

So long as Hilton acquiesces to his request to model his clothing line, I think he'll get over it. And this is the weekend to make the deal happen-NBA All-Star Weekend in Las Vegas.

It's just that Francis will have to get on his plane, meet Hilton at The Palms-or the Hilton-and figure out a way to rid themselves of Stavros, who just came in for the big shindig-and the parties, too.

But Francis knows all the right women to make this happen. Since Stavros is into Hilton, all Francis needs to do is find an anorexic-looking blonde who's into money, enjoys drinking and has a ton of unauthorized Web sites.

Ding! I got it! Britney Spears!!

If Stavros likes to drink-and Hilton can get over the fact that her mortal enemy is in the arms of another ex-then Brit is the girl for him!

It's instant publicity for Francis and a needed career boost for Spears!