Why Men Abandon Their Families: A Hypothesis
I once worked for a charitable organization that delivered food etc to families. It was xmas (note I'm an atheist and xmas means nothing to me but it's what the charity was doing) and we were delivering toys to needy children. The family we were delivering to was in a tight spot because the male spouse had left. (Apparently he just didn't come home one day). I've heard stories like this before. Now it could be that some girls are just thugged out and they hook up with useless thugs that have no sense of responsibility. However, I blame a lot of it on gender roles. Now if this lady would have had a job instead of being a "stay at home mom" as they call it, his leaving would have had much less impact. So how do gender roles cause men to abandon? In my opinion it all goes back to saddling men with all the responsibility. He earns the money, he makes the decisions, he's "the man" this manhood farce has ruined the lives of countless men. First of all we're not "men," we're people with human rights who happen to possess male gender. I tend to disregard it as a person would their appendix. It means nothing to me. When you unfairly saddle a person with such expectations because of an accident of birth and lock them into a situation where the weight of the world is on their shoulders and they have no options for having a life of their own. You sometimes drive them to make a decision to save that life. A lot of these men simply realized they were getting screwed and took off. Perhaps the right thing to do would be to have sat the "little woman" down and had a serious talk about gender equality. But of course, they have the weight of the world on there shoulders again. "Be a man". To a lot of guys this is practically life and death so he runs, runs from an impossible situation, from the suffocating weight of being essentially a slave, from having no life and being asked to sacrifice him self on yet another battle field. After all, isn't that what men do?
I've voiced these opinions before and been over heard by a few red neck type women. You wouldn't believe the vicious responses. The shear panic and spitting contempt (what fun!) these types have for guys like me is amazing. So here you have an unfair situation and an army of enforcers ready to practically spit in your face to force it on you.
I am convinced that the feminist movement has inadvertently done as much for men as it has for women. I'm a hard core feminist myself and I support it whole heartedly.
Published by Chip Bell
Chip Bell lives in Amargosa Valley Nevada with his sister Annie View profile
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7 Comments
Post a CommentYour right about moving on, it's not men or women who are responsible for the sorry state of affairs it's society and the hard times we had in the past that have done this to us as a race. Years of disease, war, and famine have taken their toll on us I look forward to seeing the direction things take in the next couple of decades. The article is intended only to point out one particular injustice that happens to be directed at men.I have other articles on line that address other injustices having to do with gender segregation and gender roles many of the articles address injustice directed at women. I wrote that article a few years back I am still sympathetic to the feminist movement and I still believe in a gender neutral society but I no longer identify as feminist I have see entirely too much finger pointing, hate speech, and witch hunt mentality within the movement to call myself a member. Also I prefer to think for myself and form my own opinions which is what I should ha
I agree that we are humans and mistakes are a learning process we hurt each other and make all these excuses for our behaviour. Sharing is caring and that goes from bills to children. Men have been burdened by head of household and it also holds a benefit men also receive higher pay and less redicule for sexual desires in society. A male can have sex and it's natural if it were a female than it's sluty. We have stereoptypes for race, gender and etc. We need to heal forgive and not wallow in our past transgression.
Sex only crates children if you want it to. Contraception works usually and abortions are readily available. Now if a couple decides to have children than there is a responsibility, what the article is about is couples sharing that responsibility equally and the harm gender roles do to familys.
People need to realize sex creates children and children create obligations.If you don't want kids get a vasctomy it the only 99% birth-control that men control. If you leave all the birth-control on one partner they can forget, take antibodics for a cold whichs renders birth-control null and void .Bottom line control your penis you have a choice whether to place it inside a vagina or not.People talk about free-love but there is no such reality all love creates decisions ,consequences life changing consequences. Get real people grow up and be adults if you aren't ready for the responsiablity of a family and don't think you will be get the snip or only date barren women. FInto.
An accidental pregnancy is 50 50 but it's no big deal really, abortions are not that expensive. The man certainly owes half the cost of the abortion. Now if the woman tries to force the child on the man that should be a crime just as if the man tries to force it on the woman. I certainly hope all women who force children on men get the karma they deserve.
Oh, the poor man, his free life is over. What about my life? An "accidental" pregnancy is 50/50 repsonsibility, period. These guys have no problem depositing the sperm, but when an accident happens, some run. You take responsibility for your actions in life no matter what -- you cause an auto accident, you break something, you accidentally produce a child; deal with it like a grown-up. I hope all dead-beat dads suffer the karma they justly deserve!
Interesting point. I dont want to judge these hypothetical men, but it's also important to really known your partner before you do get married, have children, etc. If you really know her before hand before diving into a marriage, you could decide whether or not you want to stay with her depending on her actions. I think in this case, its a case of a couple that really should not have decided to get together in the first place. Some people aren't wise or mature enough for families, unfortunately.