Why Do Men like Strip Clubs?
Why are women always so frustrated with their male counterparts? Why do men seem so primitive so much of the time? What are they thinking when they appear to be staring into outer space? All are good questions and all deserve an answer. In future columns I will try and answer them all and more.
I do realize that this column is a risk and I fear I will lose my "man card" for revealing the secrets within. But I feel after years of failed relationships and epic-sized breakups I am more than qualified to answer these questions. I've also come to another realization...it's always not the man's fault. Women just don't get it. We men are very simple creatures. We sleep, we eat, we mate, we watch sports...then the next day we do it all over again...simple.
Hopefully the topics in the coming weeks will help explain why we men are the way we are. And if there is a question about men you feel I have not covered, please feel free to contact me from my byline and I will try and enlighten you. Now...Let's get into our first topic.
Why do men like strip clubs?
Why do men love strip clubs? This is a question that seems to have plagued women for generations. Men don't seem to give it much thought. I'll see if I can explain this phenomenon.
Men frequent these establishments for one reason above all others. And that reason is simple...a guaranteed positive result for your investment. No, I'm not talking about a guaranteed romp in the hay---most men (if they are honest) will tell you that they have never slept with a stripper. Most simply go to the club to get an ego boost. Most strippers, exotic dancers, or whatever the politically correct term is, realize two basic principles:
1) Men, as a general rule, are visually stimulated and, for the most part, can separate the act of sex from emotion.
2) And two, the male ego is quite likely the most fragile creature on the planet.
The women who work in these sometimes questionable establishments play up to those egos. No matter how rich or poor, good looking or bad looking, angry or sad a man is, he can always feel like a king at a strip club (assuming of course he's willing to pay the price). When he leaves the club he feels like the most important and powerful man in the world, even if he didn't "get lucky."
Girlfriends, wives and significant others don't seem to understand this dynamic. They believe the only reason their man visits these types of clubs are because he is not happy at home. "Don't I stimulate you?" and "Aren't I sexy enough for you?" are questions that every man has heard ad nauseam after returning home from one of these wonderful establishments.
Guys, there is no way to answer this question without instigating a fight. No matter what you say, she will think you are sleeping with one, or more of the strippers. If you could talk your lady into spending time with one of these strippers, she would learn that most dancers have a strict rule about dating their clients---THEY DON'T. Most strippers believe their clients are pathetic and weak and just see them as a walking wallet. But even this is okay with the male species. As long as she makes him feel like the king of the world while he's there, she can think what she wants.
Another reason men seem to flock to strip clubs is because they can have a secret affair, albeit an imaginary one, with a beautiful woman (this goes for the single man as well). The average man realizes that most of the women who work at these establishments would never date them in their everyday lives. But your man is at the club and the stripper agrees with everything he says. She's not nagging him about emptying the trash or cleaning the rain gutters. This beautiful, and yes naked, woman sitting next to him puts him on a pedestal and treats him like he is the end-all and be-all of her existence...as long as the man continues to pay of course. In some men's minds, this is a much better investment than turning over your weekly paycheck to your wife or girlfriend. Besides, we really don't want to sleep with the stripper. We just want the ego boost she provides. (No, really we don't).
But probably the number one reason men like going to strip clubs is this...there is a 100% GUARANTEED chance that he will see a naked woman. That chance is greatly diminished if he relies solely on his significant other. I think that's reason enough for men to frequent strip clubs. Go see a naked woman, and let your imagination do the rest.
Published by Allen Shaw
My name is Allen Shaw and I am freelance writer specializing in pop culture. View profile
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38 Comments
Post a Commentto all of you women who think its okay good for you i am a mother of two it sit at home and watch my kids, i do all the house chores and i put out the trash and yes i do not care how stressed out my lover is he should respect me, he goes out constantly with a male friend of his, i said to him once i'm glad he's not a strip club guy my boyfriend didn't answer, complete silence i use to have a great body and i use to go where i pleased a man in a relationship should not be able to diss his lover by seeing a naked women or even coming home picturing this women in his mind what if he is thinking about her, i asked him when can i go out by myself he answer is he doesn't trust men then why should i trust him i don't tr ust him at all, any way a man drives a woman to bicker and then they blame us for it, they are the ones with the emotional problem they keep a woman down so they know their woman is but like i said we don't know where they are who they are with what they doing i trust no one i am no mans pet,maid or slave.
As a women, I really don't have a problem with strip clubs, been to a few with and without my man. Ladies, the solution is simple! The next time your man goes to a strip club, have a surprise waiting for him when he gets home! Order a male stripper to come to your house and give you a lap dance fully naked (with his D*%^ hanging in your face) while your man walks in! It's funny... most men I know would freak out. Then, just act surprised... why are you upset, this is just a fantacy of mine, I'm not having sex with him, so it's OK ;-) hahaha... they don't like it when the tables are turned! So it's your own fault if you just get upset and complain. Most of the time they see things differently when they know two can play the game!
yeah i could never go to a strip club if my girl was against it, that's awful to do that to someone you love.
I rarely go with buddies, maybe a bachelor party or something. I usually just get a beer or 2 and tip the dancers some.
My husband of 9 years goes to strip bar on regular basis, ones or twice a week. He has his favorite girl sex-texting him everyday how sexy and cool he is and she has a surprise between her legs for him. He does not know that I know about it and thinks that I cought him only once but I do. He saiys it is not cheating, its relaxing to him and he loves me. But I see that every time we have sex he closes his eyes and fantasizes about her and her body. It hurts me a lot but there is nothing I can do about it. I am focusing on bigger picture of the future we are building and I see that he does not want to leave me for someone else. But it is gut wrentching.
Do not get angry, do what I did. I have been married for 20yrs always faithful being a good wife and mother. after I found out he was going to strip clubs. I was angry but decided to do something good for myself. I stoped working and whent back to school full time to get a career. Now he knows I did it because of what he did. He lost my trust so now I need to protect my self and children, incase he does something else. ONe day our children will grow up and I do not want to stay married with someone who I can not trust.
Hi! I appreciated this article, it was nice to hear about what is really going on in that thick scull of his. But I have to say, that it's not nice to judge strippers, that isn't my place. But I think this is an issue that needs to be discussed by each individual couple. I personally am not fond of the idea of my guy going to stripclubs if he's in a committed relationship with me. Of course, I try to do plenty of ego stroking, laying around naked and who says a girlfriend can't do a striptease? It's good to be honest, and if a guy is really loving and respectful, he'll adhere to your feelings. But make sure you compromise...maybe naked saturdays...or sex in new places...whatever it is...make sure you're giving him the things he needs and basically just keep him so busy he won't even want to go there.
My boyfriend of 2 years recently went to a strip club for a bachelor party. I told him that I did not mind if he went to the club, but I had asked him not to touch any of the strippers and asked him not to get a lap dance. He kind of laughed at me at told me, "I'm going to do what I'm going to do." His words broke my heart, but when I found out when he got home that he had actually went through it I was devastated. How could he do this after I asked him not to? I felt dirty when he touched me the next day and wanted to cry the entire time during sex. I never felt insecure, I felt degraded and worthless. I had packed my things and cried for a few days. He and I ended up working things out, but not after I had explained to him how it made me feel. Single men can do whatever they want because they have no attachments. Even though he was doing it because of the "right of passage" rule. It broke my heart and the guys he was with constantly brag about their infidelities with their wives. Aft
I was recently really hurt to find out 8 months ago that the bachelor party my boyfriend of 3 1/2 years, went to the strip club with his buddy's, even after having conversation before hand on how I felt about it and he made me a promise if their were any strippers or clubs that he would just come home. Turns out not only did he go to the strip club but while we were haveing the conversation he already had the idea of going that night and soon after he got to the party him and 3 other guys out of 10 decided they were going to go. So now I'm heart broken, first of all because he knew how heart broken I would be if he did go and still went, second of all b/c it was just another lie, and third of all I don't feel sexy b/c he obviously had such a strong desire to go, I feel as I must not be sexy enough for him. Let me go ahead and say it's not b/c he's not getting any, in fact I could go every night but we don't I'm lucky to get it once a week(which is also a problem). I'm sure ya'll must b
(continue) shaking your money maker in their face. Most guys know they can't have sex with a stripper, but they sure as hell gonna try. It's up to the stripper to handle the situation as a professional.
I'm a stripper and a strip club is just a form of entertainment. I don't look at my clients or anyone who patronize strip clubs as weak or pathetic. They are helping me pay my bills and helping with my future. Most married men who go to strip clubs are not happy at home for one reason or another, it's a form of therapy for them. I seriously don't think their intention is to hurt their wife's feelings. I have couples that come in and as long as everyone's on the same page, strippers can actually stregthen a relationship. Women who are against men going to strip clubs need to realize it is just a fantasy. Ladies, if you can't beat them, join them. Be your man's fantasy and he won't be looking else where. Quit bitchin and nagging. And stop it with the insecurities. Of course if it becomes a problem, as with anything excessive, get therapy or a new mate. Simple as that.
This one's for Diana. Girl, most dudes want to have sex with you, especially if your tatas are hanging out and your