Why Paris Hilton is so Great!

People love to hate Paris Hilton. Intellects like to downgrade her intelligence. Hot girls like to whine because she really "isn't that pretty". Average girls bemoan the fact that she is one of those "hot girls". And guys in general like to call her names that are, um, not so nice. Despite all this negativity, I still think Paris is awesome. Here are a few reasons why Paris is so great.

Despite having big feet and somewhat strange mannerisms, Paris Hilton is, well, hot. Blonde and bedazzled (I personally think the rhinestone industry owes her, like, forever) she is definitely one to watch. Dressing to the nines, with fabulous hair extensions, and her iconic sunglasses, the girl turns heads when she's just doing some casual Saturday shopping. She comes off as flawless. While she sometimes accidentally overexposes her flawlessness, she still manages to be, well, hot.

Paris loves animals. How can you fault her for that? I mean what tiny little puppy doesn't want to be carried around in a five thousand dollar purse dressed in designer baby clothes and drinking bottled water. Every dog's dream is to inspire the creation of thousands of puppy salons, bakeries, and boutiques. And Paris has provided that. Before Paris, puppies were subjected to horrible fates. They had to walk, drink tap water (or mud puddles, or toilet water, depending on their unsophisticated tastes), and (horrors) go naked.

People cannot get enough of Paris. Paparazzi flock. Normal people buy grocery store line tabloids, just to check up on Paris. And the news (the real news) even covers her antics. What is so great about Paris is that she is making bank because of this. You do not see her complaining that the public just won't leave her alone.

The girl is a marketing genius. Blonde hair and huge sunglasses are all the rage. She stamps her name on rhinestones, a book (well, it does have pages and pretty pictures, so I guess it qualifies as a book), music, movies, and perfume and we all rush to buy it. No, it is not just the tweens that buy it. I see you blushing. Me, too. Quick hide my Paris perfume! Hey you, turn down that Paris CD.

When Paris does something bad, she makes it seem so good. I am definitely not advocating any of the naughtiness that poor Paris accidentally ends up involved in. But who looks hot in a booking photo, or flashes random assets as often as she does, and gets away with it. I think that there must be a "Paris" clause in the big old rulebook that makes it all okay.

Paris is great. She is a hot, popular, animal loving, marketing genius with excellent taste in rhinestones. You may think you hate her, but you really don't. I mean who would you rip on if Paris didn't act up? And anyway, you know you kind of want to be her, because she is, like, so great.