Why Smooth Talking Men Do Not Make Ideal Husbands

The words "How are you?" are long, drawn out, and the stress is placed on the "you" as the man approaches a woman he has never seen before in a restaurant. The woman is patiently waiting at a table for a friend of hers. This scene may not be at all uncommon and may even turn off the woman if her radar senses the pickup line. So why do so many men, with their smooth-talking and charm, turn off some women while at the same time turn on other women? More importantly, why do men who act this way around women find it almost impossible to "find the right woman" to settle down with? On the surface they appear to be nice guys, holding doors open for women, giving them flowers and candy for a date, and make dinner reservations on dates. But the women who do date men like this inevitably wind up terminating the relationship. Men like this practically never make it to "second base" and usually get their hearts broken more often than men who do not use the "smooth-talking" method for initiating relationships.

The smart woman would never marry a smooth-talker, simply because the insincerity for a solid relationship is not there. If a man has to modulate his voice as such, chances are he will continue to do so when he meets other women, regardless if he is married or not. Chances are he will also be completely self-involved and not even be into the woman he is dating. He may act like he is totally into her, but the reality is he is putting on an act that will not allow for a real emotional connection to take place.

Not too many women will waste their time (and lives) on men who are players - those men who do not know how to have a serious, mature relationship that will lead to marriage. Acting more like adolescent boys, the smooth-talker is simply more interested in the number of women that he can pick up, thinking that the more women he has, the better. This type of man may have more women, but none of them would consider him serious relationship material. Marriage is about two people in a monogamous relationship, not two people who happen to be married to each other while the man has lots of girlfriends on the side.

What woman find suspicious about the smooth-talking nice guy is this: If he is so fabulous, why isn't he married? This can be very important for men who are middle aged and never married. Maybe he is not such a good catch after all, especially by the time he has managed to smooth-talk another woman into attending his wedding, should an unsuspecting woman decide to make the mistake of marrying the man. It seems that few women make that mistake though, especially if the man tells them "I am looking for Mrs. Right." In genuine relationships, there is no "Mr. Right"; the relationship takes time to develop, with both people having common interests and values.

Finally, the smooth-talker may already have a history of being married, with none of the marriages lasting longer than a few years. This is another sign that meeting a man like this is not one to be married. Chances are he will simply drop his new wife for another woman. The amount of energy, time and money put into such a relationship is not really worth it. Women who prefer serious relationships that will lead to a real marriage are better off not getting involved with a smooth-talking man.

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