Why TMZ Ain't so Bad After All

The very idea of TMZ should make a person's skin crawl. It isn't that the media hasn't been moving toward this for a good while. The public wants to know more and more about how pathetic even the lives of the rich and famous can be, how they choose to speak to their families when they think the conversation is private, whether they prefer to eat and puke in the same location when they are drunk, and most importantly, which appetizer they find most appetizing when they do their fine dining. As long as the public demands MORE, MORE, MORE, unscrupulous leaches like TMZ will provide it. If anyone is interested in knowing the real answer to whether sane people care about Britney Spears', Paris Hilton's or any other celibri-sot's daily goings-on, it is a resounding NO.

Still, TMZ has proven it has some value. In a single week, the show has called on two celebrities (or perhaps, one and a half) on the basis of making ludicrous and fallacious statements.

The half celebrity (quarter is probably more accurate) is David Archuleta, the sixteen year old American Idol hopeful who shared his doubt about his talent with the world, stating he wondered if people were only being nice to him because he is little. Little though he may be, he is too big to smash with a fly swatter. As it seems, young David has won various singing competitions over the years, including the youth portion of Star Search at the age of twelve. If he doesn't make it as a singer, he may have a career as an actor once he learns to tone it down. This kid comes off as fake as a four dollar bill and were it not for the video footage and web sites that chronicle his busy career, his innocent, inexperienced prepubescent act may have worked. Oh well.

The whole celebrity, Kathleen Turner, wrote a memoir and went about publicizing it by denying much of what she wrote in print in a book that is on bookstore shelves for any person to peruse. She claimed that Nicholas Cage had a DUI and stole a Chihuahua (somehow reminiscent of Cage's most inspired work to date in the movie, Raising Arizona). However, upon the filing of a lawsuit against her, Turner went from feigning fugue during an interview with Matt Lauer, to vehement denial to a TMZ paparazzo. Apparently wanting to dissuade people who can read from buying her book, she denied other details included in the work. If she needed the money enough to spill the beans as she did, it is no surprise that she would want to avoid a lawsuit, and yet it seems that damaging one's credibility by acting like a witless ninny could hardly be worth the money.

Thus, the merit of TMZ consists of making stupid celebrities look stupid in the arena they know the best. The show is still garbage, yet condemning the stars with their own words has the nice ring of justice.