Will Santa Claus Be Terminated?

By this time next year it's not unreasonable to think that Santa Claus will be retired and his Workshop closed for good. That could mean his reindeer would be set loose to escape the sights of marauding hunters, or find themselves grounded at one of our local game parks. What about the elves? Well, our unemployment insurance system will have to make room for the mass layoff.

No, there won't be any Government subsidies or bailouts because it's not about money. This Christmas Corporation is self sustaining and could weather all but the close scrutiny and criticism of today's progressive society.

Was the jovial "HO HO HO' not tossed because it was said to insult the integrity of our working girls? Did Merry Christmas not find its way into the trash and become replaced with a more politically correct "Holiday Season", or "Happy Holidays". What was once a joyous remembrance of Christ and a time of love and giving is gradually becoming just one more nondescript holiday.

Is Santa's job in jeopardy? Schools are being forced to discard their vending machines in favour of nutritional diets, so such an obviously overweight man can't possibly maintain his position of role model to our children. Santa's continued endorsement of candy canes, cookies and sugar coated gingerbread will escalate his demise.

There are some who now question the methods used by Santa Claus to gain entry into homes. Is coming down the chimney uninvited in the middle of the night totally appropriate? Words like 'burglary' and 'breaking and entering' are being tossed around along with the fear that the wrong message is being sent to our children should Santa's apparent illegal activities be condoned, no matter how well intentioned his actions may be.

And there are rumblings that Santa's relationship with small children is being seriously examined. After all, he has to be the only man in the world who openly offers young ones candy to sit on his knee without the local police forces knocking on his door.

Will today's society force Santa to change in order for him to keep his job? There seems to be no question about it. Must he curtail his open affections toward children? Are candy treats to be abolished and will he be made to give the gifts to parents and not directly to the children? His Public Relations people will have to curb any hint of inappropriate behaviour.

If Santa is to continue then it seems certain he'll be pushed to diet and exercise. In all likelihood, Santa's red suit will be replaced with something less obtrusive - a sport jacket and polo shirt, perhaps. Can Santa beat the critics and maintain his position as the world's most generous and lovable man? Maybe, but the odds aren't in favour of tradition winning out over politics.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus - this year.