Winning the Space for Self Fulfillment

It was a wonderful feeling when I came to the realization that I didn't need the company of others.and preferred solitude. Now I was truly able to look out for number one and set aside my concern for others. Wanting to be alone does not mean that you have retreated into a private world only that you have given up distractions and think only of your own needs .I sit here gloating at as rest of the world indulges in their power plays while losing at the game.

I am an unique type of a hermit because I am not on a quest to find greater understanding. I never look for answers or bother to think things over. There is no need to search for a new direction because there is nowhere to go. My needs are satisfied within the confines of my own space. There have been women who attempted to break my will and invade my privacy by trying to entice me with sexual favours. One woman stripped naked before my eyes and seductively wiggled and danced in order to have me join her. But I knew that once I yielded to sexual temptation I would lose my hard won concentration and become a spiritually broken old man. She was sent home frustrated never to return.

My first spiritual awakening and enlightenment started when I awoke after a terrible nightmare and began to question the quality of my life. I came to the conclusion that I would be better off resting in peace in a quiet cemetery. But I also sensed that there was another and better reality, soon afterward I started to search for it. My search was basically a private quest because nobody but myself could supply the answers. Months latter progress was finally made after I stripped away all diversions and designed my living quarters to only meet my personal needs. Occasionally when I hear some curious neighbours knocking at the door asking to join me I tell them to bring their own food and paper plates. Nosey visitors are reminded to leave after a few hours because my concentration is distracted by their senseless jabbering and questions.

I occasionally meditate on the Tarot Cards for furthering my spiritual awareness. One card is a favourite because it reminds me of myself--- that card is the Four Of Cups. It is a picture of a man sitting under a tree who is unaware of a cup being offered to him. He misses the gift because he is absorbed in his own space. I also am absorbed in my own space and find it to be a better gift than anything that can possibly be offered to me by others.
melpol