Women and Careers: The High Price of Bacon

Remember that popular commercial in the 1970s with the hip jingle that announced that women can now bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let him forget he's a man? I believe the product that was being peddled at the time was perfume. Once you sprayed this perfume on the nape of your neck, you turned into a Fortune 500 (executive), Julia Child-cookin', sex machine! Only if it were all that simple.

Over the years, the roles of women have broadened and morphed into many things: waitress, teacher, nurse, doctor, mayor, governor, astronaut, race car driver, athlete, CIA operative, and more. Today,

It's commonplace for women to work outside the home and compete on the same economic stage as men (albeit for less money of course, but competing just the same). Oh yes, we can bring home the bacon, but why does it feel like we're paying more than full price for it?

Last year, I was watched a program on cable news about the changing roles of women in society and the possible connection between juvenile delinquency and working mothers.

Several of the talk show pundits concluded (or inferred) that families in America have suffered because women have "decided" to spend more time at the office than at home and are not available (physically or emotionally) to care for the children and therefore have helped create a society of youth criminals.

In my prior life as the president and executive director of a public policy civic group that focused on youth crime, juvenile justice research, and juvenile court reform, I can tell you that there is no connection between spikes in youth crime and working mothers. But, there is a data-driven and supported connection between up ticks in youth crime and the proliferation of guns ... not working moms.

Although women work outside the home (and many working class women have worked since they knew how to count), the scenario changes when the "working girl" now becomes someone's wife and/or mother. Now, the expectation is that your first priority (and rightly so in some circles) is your husband and family. Sure, working is nice, maybe even fabulous if you have a six-figure salary, but just don't let your job interfere with "him" or the kids.

I've always found it fascinating to observe high-profile, income producing men and the women they marry or cohabitate with. Most of the women involved with these men don't have equally high-profiles or incomes. And if they do, the relationship doesn't seem to last or is constantly on the brink of failure. Were the cable show pundits on to something?

Two years ago, a sex study was conducted to document what was going on in the bedrooms of (mostly) married couples in New York. The research concluded that sparks were not flying for many married or committed couples because of fatigue, exhaustion, or lack of interest on both parties.

Of course, the cable show I referenced earlier about the changing roles of women cited this survey as additional evidence illustrating how working moms help contribute to the downfall of the American family -- the lack of sex between a married couple. If women work, they get tired, and if they are tired, they don't have time for sex with their significant other, and of course that leads to world hunger, global warming, famine, and pestilence.

It is true that our society has become accustomed to working women and mothers. But, what is also true is that we have not (and probably will not) become accustomed to women spending too much time at the office.

I personally don't think it's healthy or productive for anyone (male or female) to spend more time on a career, or at the office, than they you do with the people they love.

But, we've given the nod to men to spend countless hours at the office or on the road ... missing all the sporting events, recitals, and school activities because, after all, he's bringing home the bacon. While women, on the other hand, have to juggle and ponder how much time at the office is seen as too much time.

Women definitely have to walk a fine line in pursuit of the bacon -- work too much and risk (perceived) alienation of your family. Or, work too little because you want a work/life balance, and be seen (perceived) as someone the company can't count on.

Where's that fancy 1970s perfume commercial jingle when you really need it?