Women with Older and Younger Husbands Die Earlier, Why?

In May of 2010 the Max Planck Institute for Demographic Research in Rostock, Germany released the results of a new demographic study, "Marriage and Life Expectancy." The study features two charts clearly illustrating that a woman's relative risk of dying at an earlier age increases when she is either younger or older than her spouse. While the study conclusively presents the data, it fails to establish exactly why this phenomenon occurs when women marry men who are not their own age. The study writers did theorize that "marrying a younger husband deviates from what is regarded as normal, these couples could be regarded as outsiders and receive less social support."

I would agree with that statement and would also agree with that statement if the older spouse was the husband. Both men and women with less than open minds frequently objectify younger wives. This is seen when certain men cajole fellow men who say "I do" to young women and when fellow females perceive a younger wife as a man's sexual object versus a life partner.

I come from a line of strong women who married men several years older than them, but I outdid them all when I picked a husband whose age was double my own with plenty of change. Our relationship was not based on hormones, daddy issues or a desire for youthful arm candy -- it was based on love, appreciation and devotion in the face of opposition. My marriage has lasted six glorious years so far and shows no signs of wearing thin.

However, these six years have shown me the lack of social support women receive when they live outside of societal boxes. I once listened to a middle-aged woman in my book club rail for several minutes on why men should snap up the nice looking older women around instead of marrying little young bimbos for sex. This is a disturbingly common thought frequently expounded on in celebrity news stories featuring younger starlets with older men.

Certain segments of society view women like me as a sex object void of thought and emotion. Completely irrelevant is the fact that I am a well-spoken, educated entrepreneur who walks on the wild side with Christian fiction, Bible studies and freelance income tax articles. I am judged because I love my husband, and, truly, I can live with that.

I can also live with not having intimate friendships or the societal support the study references, because I have a strong, supportive family. If I did not, I could easily see how the death of my older husband could lead to my dying at a younger age. Life would seem too lonely. My will to fight off illness and disease would diminish. I wouldn't look for death, but I would not hide from it either. Perhaps each woman who died and added to the demographics compiled in the "Marriage and Life Expectancy" study felt exactly the same way.