Women; is your sex drive in neutral? Is your libido limping? Many women experience a low sex drive at some time in their lives but, for most women, this is not a life sentence.
First make sure that you do not have any health problems. Get a physical and be honest with your doctor about your lackluster sex life. If your doctor rules out diabetes, heart disease, low thyroid, or low hormone levels, there is probably no physical reason for a low sex drive. But you may be so tired between taking care of your kids, doing your job, and doing housework that you have nothing left for sex. You need to have some relaxing time alone with your partner. Enlist the help of friends or family. In fact, you might work out an agreement within your circle of friends so that you take their kids for a day and they take yours another day. During this day you can nap and have sex, nap and have sex.
Have you had great sex with someone else but not with your current partner? Then your partner may need a little education. Be open and tell him or her what you like and need. Be tactful and sensitive; no one likes to be told they are not a good lover.
Probably the most common cause for a lack of sex drive is familiarity. You and your partner used to have great, passionate sex, but the thrill is gone. You've been having sex with the same partner for ten years and it's just not what it used to be. Familiarity has bred complacency and perfunctory sex.
What does every woman need? The answer is a good vibrator. You can use it to have solo sex or you can use it as an adjunct to sex with your partner. Most women who think they can't have orgasms are able to have orgasms with a vibrator. You can buy one online if you are bashful about buying one in a store. Two good, women friendly sites are Good Vibrations and Toys in Babeland.
At some time or other you may have seen some pornography and thought "yuck." It used to be that porn was made only by men for men but now there is a segment made just for couples and meant to appeal to women. Try Good Vibrations and Babeland for couples porn. You and your partner or you and your vibrator can watch a tape and get very inspired.
Another enjoyable way to wake up your sex drive is to role-play. You might be a businesswoman from out of town having a drink at a hotel bar who somehow gets picked up by a rock musician. Or, you are at home and the telephone repairperson needs to make a housecall. You are taking driving lessons and the instructor guides you into a secluded area. You get the idea.
Try making the bedroom off limits for sex. Try making intercourse off limits. Anything to get you and your partner out of the same old rut.
If none of this works, it may be time to get counseling or to see a doctor who specializes in sexual problems.
Published by sandra bell
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